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B    3    3M2    STD 

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'Prithee,  John,  why  do  you  not  speak  for  yourself?' 


HOLIDAY  PLATS 


FIVE    ONE- ACT  PIECES   FOR 

WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY,   LINCOLN'S  BIRTHDAY, 

MEMORIAL  DAY,    FOURTH  OF  JULY 

AND    THANKSGIVING 


By 

MARGUERITE  MERINGTON 

Author  of 
'^Cranford:  a  Play,''  ''The  Ficar  of  Wakefield:  a  Play"  etc. 


NE  W  YORK 
DUFF  I  ELD  AND  COMPANY 

1919 


Copyright,  1910,  by 
DUFFIELD  &  COMPANY 


SPECIAL  COPYRIGHT  NOTICE 

This  play  is  fully  protected  by  copyright,  all  requirements  of  the  law  having 
been  complied  with.  Performances  may  be  given  only  with  the  written  permission 
of  Duffield  &  Company,  agents  for  Miss  Marguerite  Merington,  owner  of  the  acting 
rights. 


f  ^  ■ ' 
CONTENTS  hL 

PaG£ 

Priscilla,  Myles  and  Johx 7        />^^,. 

Thanlcsgiving  Day. 

A  Washington's  Birthday  Pageant     ....       33 
Washington's  Birthday. 

The  First  Flag 77 

Fourth  of  July. 

Abe  Lincoln  and  Little  A.  D 107 

Lincoln's  Birthday. 

The  Dulce  et  Decorum  Club 131 

Memorial  Day. 


435 J  70 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN 


Thanksgiving  Day 


To  Ethel  M.  E. 

AND  ALL   MAIDS   OF   KIXDLY,  HELPFUL   TURN. 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN 


Charactees:     PrisciUa,  Myles  and  John,  also  Priscillas 

mother.  Mistress  Mullens. 
Time:     Autumn,  A.  D.  1621. 

Scene:     The  living-room   in   a   log  calin  in  Plymouth 
Colony.    A  door,  standing  wide,  opens  on  the  village 
street;  another,  closed,   leads   to   an   inner  room.     A 
casement  window  with  oiled  paper  in  place  of  panes 
of  glass  is  open.   The  furniture,  of  the  period,  is  scant 
and  plain.    Priscilla  is  discovered  sitting  at  her  spin- 
ning wheel,  and  singing  as  she  spins: 
''Over  the  fountains  and  over  the  tvaves, 
Under  the  fountains  and  under  the  graves. 
Under  floods  that  are  deepest  which  Neptune  oley. 
Over  rocks  that  are  steepest  Love  will  find  out  the  way!'" 


Mistress  Mullens. 

[Enters  from  inner  room.'] 

Priscilla!  Priscilla!  There  is  sickness  at  Governor 
Carver's,  and  Mr.  Fuller  hath  asked  me  to  assist  in— 
Priscilla ! 

Priscilla. 

Ave,  mother! 


10''* 'HO'LID AY  PLAYS 

"     Mistress  Mullens. 

I'm  going  out,  child.  There  is  sickness  down  the  road — 
at  Governor  Carver's.  Nothing  serious,  but  Mr.  Fuller 
hath  asked  me  to  assist  him  in  leeching.  What  art  thou 
watching,  child? 

Priscilla. 
Oh,  naught  to  speak  of,  mother !    Merely  shadows  ! 

Mistress  Mullens. 

[Follows  Priscilla's  gaze  to  the  door.]  I  see  no 
shadows ! 

Priscilla. 

They  have  passed  by!  But  they  will  return  anon,  or 
my  name  at  these  presents  is  not  Priscilla  Mullens.  [To 
herself.] 

Mistress  Mullens. 

What  said  you  then,  child? 

Priscilla. 

I  only  sent  an  idle  phrase  to  chase  the  shadows!  Aye, 
here  they  come :  a  tall  shadow  and  a  short  one ! 

Mistress  Mullens. 

And  there  they  go — Captain  Myles  Standish  with  Master 
John  Alden,  whose  company  he  hath  affected  much  of  late ! 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN  11 

They  both  have  done  us  many  services  since  your  poor 
father  died.  Perhaps  it  would  be  but  friendly  to  invite 
them  in,  and 

Priscilla. 
[Hurriedly  stopping  her  mother.']     Oh,  no,  mother  I 

MiSTEEss  Mullens. 

How  now,  child  ?    Why  so  agitated  over  a  simple  proffer 

of  simple  hospitality? 

Pbiscilla. 

Xay,  but — if  they  cross  our  threshold,  let  it  be  of  their 
own  accord !  Captain  Standish  is  an  important  man  in 
our  colony,  while  Master  Alden  is  reckoned  one  of  the 
most  promising  of  the  younger  adventurers  I  And  it  might 
seem  too  forth-putting  I 

Mistress  Mullexs. 

Forth-putting !  I  like  that  I  Was  not  your  father  a 
well-conditioned  tradesman  as  well  as  a  merchant  ad- 
venturer of  this  enterprise?  Why,  child,  you  are  quite 
a  fortune  I  Under  his  will  do  you  not  inherit  ten  pounds 
in  money,  one-fourth  interest  in  all  his  goods,  including 
the  boots  and  shoes  he  brought  out  here  for  purposes  of 
traffic,  one-sixth  interest  in  the  red  cow  that  is  to  follow 
by  the  next  boat  that  comes  this  way,  not  to  speak  of  sun- 
dry articles  including  a  betty  lamp,  a  copper  saucepan 
and  a  sundial  I 


12  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Priscilla. 


I  know,  mother !    Oh,  I  know !    There  they  go  again ! 

Mistress  Mullens. 

'Tis  true,  there  is  not  much  choice  of  husbands  for  thee 
in  our  tiny  band. 

Priscilla. 

I  do  not  crave  a  choice ! 

Mistress  Mullens. 
What  say  you  ?    You  crave  not  a  husband  ? 

Priscilla. 

I  say  I  crave  not  a  choice  of  husbands !    One  will  suffice 
me! 

Mistress  Mullens. 

My  sauce  box  !    Why,  art  fevered,  child  ?    Cheeks  aflame. 
Can  it  be  a  touch  of  the  plague? 

Priscilla. 

jSTay,  mother!     I  have  been  bending   overlong  at  my 
stint,  that  is  all ! 

Mistress  Mullens. 

Then  I  leave  the  house  in  your  care !    And  if  our  good 
neighbors  should  enter  in  my  absence 


PEISCILLA,    MILES    AXD    JOHX  13 

Priscilla. 
Well,  mother?    What  then? 

Mistress  Mullens. 

He  is  a  good  man,  Priscilla.  A  pious,  well-approved 
gentleman.  His  regard  would  honor  any  maiden.  I  trust 
you  will  not  flout  him  I 

Priscilla. 

Flout  him !  Why,  madam,  ever  since  I  have  beheld  Mas- 
ter Alden  gaze  upon  me  with  a  modestly  favorable  eye  I 
have  been  the  happiest  maid  in  Pl}Tnouth  Colony— in  all 
the  world,  I  do  believe!  Flout  John  Alden!  John! 
[Buries  her  face  on  her  mother's  shoulder.] 

Mistress  Mullens. 

[To  herself,  surprised,  over  Priscilla's  head.]  Oho! 
John  Alden!  Sits  the  wind  in  that  quarter!  I  had 
thought  it  was  Captain  Myles  Standish !  IS^or  am  I  sure 
that  It  is  not,  on  his  side,  that  is  to  say !  Well,  well,  child ! 
Give  not  your  answer,  even  to  your  mother,  till  the  ques- 
tion hath^been  asked  of  you!  And  then— be  sure  all  will 
come  out  right! 

Priscilla. 

How  good  you  are  so  to  understand  me !  Fancy  a  great, 
tall  youth  like  Master  Alden  being  unable  to  pluck  up 
resolution  to  plead  his  own  cause  so  that  he  must  needs 


14  HOLIDxW  PLAYS 

trouble  Captain  Standish  to  protect  him !  [Sits  at  spin- 
ning wlieel  again.']  T  vow  lie  deserves  not  that  I  should 
entreat  him  kindly — that  is^  at  first! 

Mistress  Mullens. 

Hm!  I'll  go  make  poultices,  and  leave  you  to  your 
shadows !  [Takes  cloak  from  peg  and  goes  by  the  door 
to  inner  room.    Myles  knocks  at  street  door.] 

Priscilla. 
Here  come  they  now !    Ahem  !    Who  knocks  ? 

Myles. 
Mistress  Priscilla ! 

Priscilla. 

0  good-morrow,  Captain  Standish  I  Good-morrow, 
Master  Alden!  Enter  pray!  [Myles  enters,  followed  ly 
John.] 

Myles. 
We  would  speak  with  Mistress  Mullens! 

Priscilla. 

My  mother  is  presently  abroad,  ministering  to  a  sick 
neighbor.  Pray  be  seated.  She  will  return  anon !  [They 
sit.l 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN  15 

Myles. 

You  sang  the  while  you  span.  As  John  Alden  said,  it 
did  mind  us  pleasingly  of  our  English  nightingale !  [In- 
terrupts JoHX  tcJw  would  protest.]  Aye,  so  did  you,  John, 
and  well  done,  too  I     What  is  the  song,  Mistress  ? 

Priscilla. 

'Twas  being  newly  sung  in  London  when  we  left  last 
year.     "Love  will  find  out  the  way  V 

Myles. 
"Lo\  e  will  find  out  the  way  !"    A  favorable  omen,  John ! 
[John  nods  absent,  hut  sighs.] 

Priscilla. 

Gay  ditties  still  rise  to  my  lips,  where,  perchance,  good 
Elder  Brewster  would  say  psalms  should  be  more  frequent ! 

Myles. 

0  for  all  his  zeal  for  religious  freedom.  Master  Brew- 
ster is  no  long-visaged  scorner  of  cheerfulness !  Why,  but 
even  now,  meeting  us  coming  hither,  he  said —  Quote 
what  Master  Brewster  said,  John! 

John. 
Not  I ! 


16  HOLIDAY    PLAYS 

Priscilla. 
I  pray  you! 

JOHX. 

It  fits  not  the  occasion.  Mistress ! 

Myles. 
0  but  'tis  most  apt  to  it ! 

John. 
Then,  quote  yourself  forsooth,  Captain! 

Myles. 
Sooner  would  I  cut  out  my  tongue — before  a  maid ! 

JOHIT. 

Mine  own  case,  like  as  two  staves  of  a  barrel ! 

Priscilla. 

Yon  goeth  Master  Brewster!    I  shall  go  question  him! 

Myles  axd  John. 
Mistress  Priscilla !    Prithee  forbear  ! 

Priscilla. 

Not  unless  you  yourselves  inform  me !     Well  ? 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN  17 

Myles. 

He  said — Master  Brewster  said — "Here  we  are!" 

Priscilla. 

A  wonderful  discovery !  Here  we  are !  I  trust  you 
ventured  not  to  contradict  it!     But  is  that  all? 

John. 

Xay,  to  do  him  justice.  Here  we  are,  he  said,  a  handful 
of  English  folk  together  in  a  strange  new  world !  But  a 
scant  score  of  men  souls ;  half  so  many  women  souls — and 
some  children !  The  rest  who  started  forth  upon  our  pil- 
grim venture  asleep  on  Burial  Hill.  The  ocean  between 
us  and  all  civil  countries !  ^Yith  little  solace  in  respect  to 
outward  objects  whichsoever  way  we  turn  the  eye — save 
upward!  Then,  since  many  of  our  number  do  be  wid- 
owers  

Myles. 
And  some  bachelors  !     Forget  not  that,  John ! 

John. 

And  some  by  the  grace  of  God  bachelors [Priscilla 

coughs.l  And  some  of  the  women  being  widows 

Priscilla. 

And  some  spinsters  by  the  grace  of  God !  Well !  Pro- 
ceed !     Or,  stay !     I  divine  what  Master  Brewster  did  ad- 


18  HOLIDAY    PLAYS 

vise  accordingly!  Such  being  our  forlorn  state,  'twere 
best  to  make  an  end  on't,  offering  ourselves  as  victims  to 
Indian  arrows  or  tlie  plague ! 

Myles. 

Nay,  indeed,  Mistress!     Not  so!     Tell  her,  John! 

JOHI^. 

He  said  nowt  would  please  him  better  than  to  cry  the 
banns  of  any  well-matched  couple,  and  in  his  office  of 
magistrate  to  join  the  same  as  man  and  wife!  [Mops 
brow.] 

Myles. 

Well  done ! 

Priscilla. 

I  do  protest,  gentlemen,  I  see  nowt  in  that  so  startling ! 
Unless,  in  sooth,  you  have  been  perverted  by  the  Indians, 
who  think  it  a  grievous  fate  for  a  man  to  be  tied  to  but 
one  wife! 

Myles  and  John. 
Oh,  Mistress  Priscilla ! 

Priscilla. 

And  now,  since  my  mother  may  be  tarrying  beyond  her 
errand  over  the  gossip  of  the  colony,  I  will  inform  her  of 
your  presence!  Meanwhile  if  you  do  run  away  I  shaU 
take  it  that  you  are  af eared ! 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN  19 

Myles  and  John. 
Af  eared.  Mistress  !     Prithee  of  what  danger  ? 

Priscilla. 
For  that  ask  Master  Brewster  !     [Laughs  and  runs  out.] 

Myles. 
Xow  what,  think  you,  meant  she  by  that,  John? 

John. 

Truly,  Captain,  I  know  not  I  It  may  have  been  a  mere 
woman's  pointless  pleasantry  for  the  sake  of  being  pleas- 
ant! 

Myles. 

Aye,  pleasant  is  she  in  sooth!  ^Twould  be  a  sore  fate 
to  be  bound  to  a  froward,  waspish  tongue!  [John  as- 
sents.]   Pleasant  is  this  maid,  and  fair — fair  as 

John. 

Aye,  as  the  flower  of  the  May  that  doth  whiten  our  Eng- 
lish hedges  in  the  spring! 

Myles. 

Well  said,  John  !  Art  quite  a  poet !  [John  disclaiiyis.] 
You'll  recite  to  the  maid  all  these  fine  things  I  do  think 
of  her  but  know  not  how  to  phrase  ? 


20  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


JOHX. 


A3'e,  sooth,  that  will  I,  unless  my  tongue  belie  me.  Fair, 
nightingale  and  pleasant  I 

Myles, 

Also,  since  she  is  under  covert  of  her  parent,  the  mother 
must  be  won.  Xame  to  Mistress  Mullens  with  what  sub- 
stantial goods  I  can  endow  her  daughter  I 

JOHX. 

Aye,  I  did  note  them  with  particularity.  Item,  one 
house  with  windows  of  glass  where  others  are  fain  to  use 
paper  soaked  in  linseed  oil.     Item,  one  copy  of  Csesar's 

Commentaries  and  a  coat-of-mail 

Myles. 

My  Eose  had  all  these  things — and  the  plague  took  her 
in  the  spring!  [Goes  to  vjindow.]  Xo  stone  marks  it, 
yet  can  I  pick  out  the  very  spot  upon  the  hillside  where 
she  lies ! 

JOHX. 

Captain — "tis  but  autumn  I  What  if  the  maid  thinks 
you  come  a-courting  over  soon? 

Myles. 

Then  put  her  right,  as  you  best  know  the  way !  Even 
as  our  graves  are  level  and  unmarked  lest  hostile  Indians 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  A\D  JOHN  21 

learn  how  many  of  our  colony  sleep  underground,  while 
corn  grows  over  them,  so  must  the  griefs  we  sowed  in 
spring  whiten  to  the  harvest's  happiness!  Little  more 
than  a  year,  but  we've  lived  a  lifetime  since  we  left  the 
old  Plvmouth  for  the  new!  Our  colony  needs  sons  and 
daughters  who  shall  sa}',  our  Pilgrim  fathers  were  English- 
men who  crossed  the  seas  to  found  a  new  England  dedicated 
to  religious  liberty ! 

John. 

Captain,  such  eloquence— plead  your  own  cause  with  the 
maiden ! 

Myles. 

I !    A  plain,  blunt  soldier  !     Besides,  my  tongue  forgets 
youth's  odd-knackeries  of  talk !    Wiy,  John,  I  am 

John. 
In  the  flower  of  your  prime ! 

Myles. 

Lad,  in  a  group  where  the  oldest  man  is  barely  turned 
fortv,  thirty-six  is  growing  old !  [John  tries  to  protest.'] 
John,  when  I  hold  parley  with  the  Indians  I  take  the  In- 
dian Squanto  for  interpreter !  So,  now,  lacking  youth,  I 
call  on  vour  two  and  twenty  years  to  interpret  betwixt  me 
and  this  maid!  Whv.  John,  art  sick?  Hast  fever,  ague, 
or  a  queasy  stomach?  Pray  go  get  Master  Fuller  to  physic 
thee ! 


22  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

JOHK". 

'Tis  nowt,  sir !  Just  a  passing  feeling !  Captain  Myles 
Standish,  I  do  pledge  n^yself  to  plead  your  cause  as  ^twere 
mine  own ! 

Myles. 

Friend,  I  thank  thee !  And  so  when  thy  turn  conies  do 
I  pledge  myself  to  do  for  thee ! 

[They  clasp  hands.     Ppjscilla  enters.'] 

Priscilla. 

My  mother  follows,  sirs.  Meanwhile  she  bids  me  offer 
entertainment :  a  stoup  of  beer,  or  strong  waters-  from  my 
father's  store, 

John". 

I  thank  you,  none !  I'll  go  meet  Mistress  Mullens  ere 
my  courage  oozes  out!     [Goes  out.~\ 

Myles. 
A  brave  lad  that,  and  comely  of  feature ! 

Priscilla. 

Truly  he  hath  a  good  conceit  of  his  back,  if  it  be  not  fear 
that  ever  makes  him  turn  it  on  me ! 

Myles. 

Oh,  Mistress  Priscilla !  But  to  hear  him !  I  warrant 
you  he  hath  a  tongue ! 


\ 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN  23 

Priscilla. 
He  proves  it  by  his  faculty  for  holding  it! 

Myles. 

Ere  long,  I  promise  you,  you'll  hear  it  wag!  Mistress 
Priscilla,  when  he  asks  you  something  will  you  hearken 
to  him  kindly? 

Priscilla. 

Xow  what  in  the  world  could  Master  Alden  ever  ask  of 
me? 

Myles. 
There's  but  one  thing  ever  a  man  asks  of  any  woman! 

Priscilla. 

Xow,  pardon,  Captain,  I  have  heard  both  father  and 
brother  ask  my  mother  many  things ! 

Myles. 

And,  pardon,  Mistress  Priscilla,  but  a  man's  requests 
to  mother,  wife,  however  lovingly  preferred  and  granted, 
are  but  in  sooth  commands ! 

Priscilla. 

Indeed?  'Tis  good  in  you  so  to  interest  yourself  in 
Master  Alden's  affairs.  Captain! 


24  HOLIDAY    PLAYS 

Myles. 

A  goodness  that  I  trust  will  redound  to  mine  own 
profit ! 

Priscilla. 

jSTow  what  means  he  by  that?  My  distaff's  empty.  I 
must  fetch  more  yarn! 

[Goes  into  inner  room.     John  returns.'] 

Myles. 

Thank  Heaven  you  come,  John!  I  had  nearly  spoiled 
my  cause  by  broaching  it!     Well? 

JoHX. 

Mistress  Mullens  gives  willing  consent,  but  would  put 
no  constraint  upon  her  daughter,  who  must  herself  be 
sued! 

Myles. 

Then  go  to,  boy;  sue  her!     I  have  prepared  the  way! 

John. 
Captain,  stay  by  me  to  prompt  my  speech! 

Myles. 
!N'ay !     [Alout  to  go.] 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN  25 

John. 
Yea!     [Detaining  him.'] 

Priscilla. 

[Has    entered.']      What    means    this    yea-and-naying  ? 
[Both  men  show  embarrassment.    Suddenly  loud  dis- 
cordant sounds  from  a  trumpet  are  heard  without. 
Priscilla  shrieks  with  fright.] 

Myles. 

Fear  nowt,  Mistress!  'Tis  but  an  Indian  sagamore 
who  came  to  truck  with  us !  To  keep  him  from  counting 
our  diminished  numbers  I  lent  him  our  trumpet  to  prac- 
tise on!  [Louder  iioise.]  1*11  go  stay  him!  Go  to, 
John,  lad!  Sue  her!  Tve  prepared  the  way !  [Goes  out 
hurriedly.] 

JOHX. 

A  valiant  man  in  sooth  is  Captain  Myles  Standish! 

Priscilla. 
Aye,  Master  Alden,  like  yourself,  he  never  seems  afeared 
— to  run  away ! 

JOHX. 

Oh,  Mistress  Priscilla,  when  he  bears  a  commission  from 
Queen  ^Elizabeth,  is  renowned  for  victories  against  the 
Spaniards  in  the  Lowlands,  and  now  is  termed  the  Sword- 
hand  of  our  colony! 


26  HOLIDAY    PLAYS 

Priscilla. 
Tell  me  of  your  owii  occupation,  Master  Alden. 

John. 

Indeed,  Mistress,  I  do  but  wield  a  cleaver,  as  j^ou  know, 
to  bring  in  clapboard  from  the  forest  to  make  staves  for 
kilderkin !    But 

Priscilla. 

But  you  do  write  a  fair  and  clerkly  hand,  and,  some  say, 
will  be  next  assistant  to  the  Governor — and,  who  knows? 
Som^e  day  Governor. 

JOHX. 

It  may  be!  Goodly  to  look  upon,  do  you  not  think 
Captain  Standish? 

Priscilla. 

He  casts  a  short  shadow,  even  as  Master  Alden  casts  a 
tall  one! 

John. 

Oh,  Mistress !  A  little  man,  but  a  great  captain !  Like 
the  vessel  Mayflower,  small  but  staunch!  Kind  of  heart, 
and  in  this  world's  goods  plentifully  endowed.  He  uses 
silverware  where  the  rest  of  us  pilgrims  drink  our  beer 
from  pewter.  Then,  next  boat  will  bring  him  glass  for  his 
windows,  while  our  share  of  sunlight  comes  through  oiled 
paper.  And  soon  will  he  build  him  a  large  house,  pat- 
terned and  named  after  his  ancestral  home  of  Duxborough. 
Also  is  he  heir  to  a  vast  estate,  which  presently  is  being 
surreptitiously  detained  from  him  by  legal  villainy ! 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN  27 

Priscilla. 

Truly  am  I  myself  something  of  a  fortune,  and  though 
no  match  in  that  respect  for  Captain  Standish,  yet,  wed 
or  single,  need  I  fear  no  poverty.  Had  you  heard  my 
mother  not  an  hour  agone  enumerate  the  articles  of  my 
inheritance — ten  pounds  in  money,  boots  and  shoes  to  sell, 
one-sixth  of  a  red  cow  that  is  to  follow  us  out  here  from 
Surrey,  not  to  speak  of  one  betty  lamp,  a  copper  kettle 
and  a  sundial ! 

John. 
A  fitting  match  indeed  !     [Slglis.] 

Priscilla. 

Eh?  What  said  you  then?  Surely  you  fear  not  my 
worldly  goods  will  make  my  spirit  proud ! 

John. 

Oh,  Mistress !  As  well  accuse  the  turtle  dove  of  pride ! 
But,  harking  back  to  Myles  Standish,  though  not  a  church- 
member  he  is 

Priscilla. 

Oh,  a  most  pious,  well-approved  gentleman!  In  truth, 
half-orphaned  as  I  am  I  do  look  upon  him  something  as  a 
father ! 

John. 

Oh,  Mistress !  Pray  you  cast  out  that  thought !  A 
father ! 


28  HOLIDAY    PLAYS 

Peiscilla. 
But,  why  so  astonished,  prithee,  Master  Alden? 

JOHX. 

Because — because — have  you  not  guessed  my  errand  ? 

Peiscilla. 
Indeed,  sir,  I  did  think — did  hope,  perhaps— Xought ! 

JOHX. 

To  hark  back  to  Captain  Standish.  He  appoints  me  his 
trusted  ambassador.  He  commissions  me  to  entreat  your 
hand  in  marriage ! 

Peiscilla. 
My  hand!     In  marriage!     Witli — with  whom? 

JOHX. 

With  whom  but  himself,  Captain  Myles  Standish !  Mis- 
tress Priscilla,  I  entreat  you,  do  not  so  cover  your  face  with 
your  hands  and  rock  to  and  fro,  so  that  I  know  not  whether 
you  do  laugh  or  cry !  0  blunderbuss  am  I  so  to  fright  an 
unsuspecting  maid  with  talk  of  marriage !  Dear  Mistress, 
sooner  would  I  with  mine  own  cleaver  make  clapboard  of 
myself   than   distress   yoij -'       Prithee    .     .     .     [fal-es  her 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN  29 

hand].  Nay,  look  not  out  of  window,  nor  toward  the 
door — nor  upward  to  the  rafters,  nor  on  the  floor  beneath ! 
I  offer  you  that  of  which  any  woman  might  be  proud — 
a  good  man's  love.  There,  let  me  fan  thee  with  my  hat, 
while  you  do  so  gasp  for  breath !  That's  better !  And 
now,  my  answer !  I  mean,  to  hark  back  to  Captain  Myles 
Standish — 

Priscilla. 

Captain  Myles  Standish — Master  John  Alden — 

John. 

Aye,  a  brave  beginning.  Captain  Myles  Standish! 
Well! 

Priscilla. 

John  Alden — prithee  why  do  you  not  speak  for  yourself, 
John? 

JOHX. 

Priscilla!  Dear — dearest — [Takes  lier  Jiand  and  hisses 
it.    At  the  moment  Myles  enters,  stands  amazed.'] 

Myles. 
Great  Providence!     What  is  this  I  behold!     [Turns  to 

gO'] 

John. 

[Turns,  sees  him.]  Oh,  shame  on  me!  A  friend  for- 
sworn! A  false  ambassador!  Oh,  death  were  my  desert! 
[About  to  go.  ] 


30  HOLIDAY    PLAYS 

Mtles. 

[Detains  Mm.']  Try  marriage  instead!  Nay,  John 
Alden!  On  my  soul  I  know  you  did  your  honorable  best 
for  me ! 

Priscilla. 
Aye,  sir.    That  did  he,  but 

Myles. 

But  by  the  grace  of  God,  and  with  your  timely  aid, 
unwittingly  he  spake  better  for  himself  !  Eh,  Mistress  Pris- 
cilla ?   'Tis  natural.  Youth  speaks  to  youth  for  youth. 

Mistress  Mullens. 

[Enters  from  inner  room.]  Why,  what  means  this 
romantical  hand-clasping!     Priscilla,  gentlemen! 

Myles. 

Good  Mistress  Mullens,  I  did  promise  my  friend  John, 
and  do  stand  pledged,  to  speak  for  him,  in  his  behalf,  should 
his  love-suit  need  an  intercessor !  But  by  the  kindly  glim- 
mer in  your  eye  I  do  think  his  cause  already  won ! 

John. 

Oh,  ^Mistress  Mullens — Priscilla 


Priscilla. 
Ave,  mother  !    John 


PRISCILLA,  MYLES  AND  JOHN  31 

Mistress  Mullens. 

A  blessing  on  you  both,  my  children !— Captain 
Myles  Standish,  honor  us  by  pledging  a  toast!  [Gets 
out  wine.'] 

Myles. 

Aye,  a  toast!  Youth  speaks  to  youth  for  youth,  and  all 
is  well  with  Plymouth  Colony  I 


WASHINGTON'S    BIRTHDAY 
PAGEANT 


Washington's   Birthday 


To  George  G.  R. 

AND  ALL  BOYS  WHO  DO  THEIE  DUTY. 


A  WASHINGTOX'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT 

Talcing  place  in  the  library  of  Sunnyside,  Washington 
Irving's  house  at  Irving ton-on-Hudson,  on  February 
22,  1859. 

The  room  has  two  doors.  By  one  of  these,  called 
the  first  door,  the  characters  mahe  their  first  entrance. 
By  the  other,  called  the  second  door,  they  malce  their 
filial  exit.  There  is  a  window.  A  small  table  stands 
near  the  first  door.  On  it  lie  unopened  letters  of  the 
fashion  of  the  year.  On  one  side  of  the  room,  against 
the  luall,  and  near  the  audience,  stands  a  fine  new 
library  table.  On  it  lies  a  letter,  unopened,  unstamped. 
By  it  stands  a  comfortable  chair.  Shelves  with  booTcs 
line  the  walls,  but  except  for  a  chair  or  so  the  floor 
space  is  unencumbered.  Washington  Irving,  now 
76  years  old,  is  the  sole  character  outside  the  pageant 
which  is  supposed  to  tahe  place  in  his  fancy,  the  au- 
dience seeing  it  as  it  passes  before  his  inward  eye 
while  he  muses  in  his  easy  chair. 


CHAEACTEES  IN  THE  PAGEANT. 

Scene  1. 

[At  the  Washington  home  in  Virginia,  Feb.  22,  1747.] 
George  Washington,  aged  fifteen. 
Mrs.  Washington,  his  mother,  a  widow,  still  young. 
Thomas,  Lord  Fairfax,  an  English  nolleman  of  middle 

age. 
A  colored  servant. 


Scene  II. 

[A  room  in  Washington's  headquarters  at  Valley  Forge, 
Feb.  22,  1778.] 

General  Washington,  Commander  of   the  Armies  of 

America. 
Colonel  Fitzgerald,  one  of  Washington's  aides. 
Dr.  Craik,  of  the  Medical  Staff  of  the  Army. 
Mr.  Bryan  Fairfax,  of  Belvoir. 
Colonel  Alexander  Hamilton. 
The  Marquis  de  Lafayette. 

William  Lee  (Billy),  Washington's  mulatto  servant. 
Two  Soldiers  of  the  Provincial  Army. 
Mrs.  Washington,  wife  of  the  General. 
Mrs.  Greene,  wife  of  Gen.  Greene. 
Mrs.  Knox,  wife  of  Gen.  Knox. 
Mary,  a  child. 
[Other  gentlemen  of  Washington's  military  family  with 

their  wives  may  appear  at  the  close.'] 


Scene  III. 

[A  room  at  Mt.  Vernon,  Feb.  22,  1799.] 

George  Washington",  ex-President  of  the  United  States. 

Major  Lawrence  Lewis,  liis  nephew. 

Col.  Lear,  his  secretary. 

George  Washington  Lafayette,  son  of  the  Marquis  de 
Lafayette. 

Billy. 

Mrs.  Washington. 

Eleanor  Parke  Custis,  her  granddaughter  {Nellie). 

Three  different  individuals  are  needed  to  personate  ^Yash- 
ington  in  the  several  scenes,  and  two  to  personate 
Martha  Washington.  The  same  individual  may  rep- 
resent the  two  Lafayettes,  provided  the  change  of  cos- 
tume can  he  effected  in  time.  The  slightest  delay  in 
entrances  will  spoil  the  illusion. 


A    \YASHL\GTON'S    BIRTHDAY 
PAGEANT 

Irving. 

[Enters,  rather  wearily,  speaking  to  himself.]  And  now 
for  the  day's  work  I  Ah,  dear  me ;  I  fear  I  have  an  attack 
of  old  age !  How  beautiful  it  would  be  if  one  could  begin 
life  at  the  end,  being  born  old;  then,  working  through  ma- 
turity to  youth,  cut  one's  first  tooth  at  seventy,  and  die 
3'oung,  a  happv  child! 

[He  comes  upon  his  mail.-]  Letters,  letters,  letters! 
[He  picks  up  one  and  examines  it.]  "Mr.  Washington 
Irving,  Sunnyside,  Irvington-on-Hudson,  Xew  York."'  A 
lady's°hand.    Probably  wants  my  autograph. 

[Opens  letter,  and  glances  over  the  contents.]  ''Dear 
Sir,  although  a  stranger— venture  to  inquire,  were 
you  named  after  George  Washington  ?'"— Yes,  dear 
Madam,  since  it  interests  you  to  know,  such  is  the  case !  I 
happened  to  be  born  in  1783,  the  year  that,  the  struggle  for 
independence  safely  over,  George  Washington  resigned  his 
commission  as  commander-in-chief,  and,  though  I  dont  re- 
call the  circumstance,  I'm  told  my  dear  mother  said, 
^•'Washin^on's  work  is  ended,  and  our  child  shall  be  named 
af^er  him  V  And  so  I  was  baptized  in  St.  George's  Chapel 
in  Beekman  Street,  Xew  York!  Well,  at  least  it  procured 
for  me  a  benediction  from  the  illustrious  man  himself! 


40  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Well  do  I  remember  liow  my  Scotch  nurse  Lizzie  followed 
Washington  into  a  shop,  dragging  me  by  the  hand  after 
her.  He  was  President  of  the  Ignited  States  then,  but  that 
didn't  abash  Lizzie !  "Please  your  Honor/'  said  she — 
"Please  your  Honor,  here's  a  bairn  named  after  you !"  My 
head  was  then  where  my  knee  is  now.  And  stooping,  Wash- 
ington laid  his  hand  on  it  and  blessed  me ! — And  now 
to  work  to  finish  the  story  of  his  life  !  Wait,  though  !  More 
letters!  One  from  England.  To  be  sure,  it's  Charles 
Dickens'  writing.  Glorious  Dickens,  I'll  save  that  for  a 
treat.  And  this  is  from  Prescott ;  dear,  friendly  Prescott ! 
[Opens  the  letter,  and  7'eads.']  "I  have  just  closed  the 
fourth  volume  of  your  life  of  Washington.  I  never  before 
fully  comprehended  the  character  of —  Xo  one — no  Amer- 
ican, could  read  this  without  finding  pretty  often  a  tear 
blurring  the  page !" —  And  here's  one  from  Bancroft,  and 
one  from  Brace.  [He  reads  a  snatch  of  this  letter.] 
"Washington  looms  out  grandly.  Were  I  a  boy  I  should 
read  his  life  like  Robinson  Crusoe  or  Captain  Cook's  Ad- 
ventures !" — I  wonder  indeed  if  I  have  succeeded  in  making 
it  interesting — this  story  of  Washington — to  boys  and 
girls !  [He  has  crossed  the  room  while  speaking,  and  now 
comes  upon  the  new  library  tahle.]  Why,  what's  this! 
What  a  fine  aif air !  But  how  comes  it  here  ?  [He  picks  up 
the  letter  lying  on  the  table  and  reads.]  "A  birthday  pres- 
ent from  3'Our  publishers."  A  l)irthday — why,  it  isn't 
my  birthday!  [He  looks  at  a  calendar  on  the  table.]  Feb- 
ruary the  twenty-second.  Oh,  of  course !  A  Washington's 
birthday  present !  Ha,  ha,  ha  !  How  thoughtful !  Let  me 
see;  this  is  1859.  Sixty  years  since  Washington  died.  A 
hundred  and  twenty-seven  years  since  he  was  born.     And 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT    41 

his  birthday  still  is  kept  I  i  wuiider  if  boys  and  girls  in 
times  to  come  will  read  what  he  did  for  our  country  and 
keep  his  birthday  always !  [He  sits  in  the  easy  chair  beside 
iJie  tahle^  and  fingers  his  papers  absently.']  If  they  could 
only  see  him  as  I  do,  young,  ardent,  with  tastes  and  ambi- 
tions like  their  own — in  those  early  days,  with  his  mother, 
in  their  Virginia  home — [Leans  bach,  eyes  closed.] 


SCEXE  I. 

Mrs.  Washixgtox. 

[Enters,  ivith  workbasJcet  and  an  opened  letter  first  door.~\ 
George  I  George !  Where  are  you,  my  son  ?  What,  out  since 
daybreak  and  not  yet  returned!  [Sits  at  window,  works.] 


George. 

[Outside.]  Halloa  I  Halloa  I  Mulatto  Jack !  Come, 
take  my  horse ! 

Mrs.  Washixgtox. 

Here  comes  he  now  !  What  a  fine,  i^  sturdy  youth  he 
grows !  Noble  and  distingTiished  looking,  like  liis  father, 
though  not  for  worlds  would  I  have  him  hear  me  say  so ! 


George. 
Mother  I     [Enters,  first  door.]     Good  morning,  madam! 


42  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Mrs.  Washingto^t. 
Well,  my  son !     Had  you  good  sport  ? 

George. 

Tolerable  good!  After  a  hard  chase  I  catehed  a  fox! 
But  I  have  a  confession  to  make !  I  fear  I  taxed  one  of 
the  colts  beyond  its  strength  in  trying  to  break  it !  Apart 
from  3^our  just  displeasure  it  grieves  me  sorely  to  cause  a 
creature  suffering ! 

Mrs.  Washington. 

You  do  well  to  confess  your  fault!  [A  slight  pause.] 
George,  the  English  packet  brought  me  a  letter 

George. 

Aye,  so  I  could  not  but  observe,  in  my  Uncle  BalPs  hand. 
Pray,  madam,  is  it  settled  that  I  may  go  to  sea? 

Mrs.  Washington. 
It  is  settled  otherwise! 

George. 

Oh,  oh!  I  had  set  my  heart — Indeed,  madam,  I  mean 
no  rebellion  against  your  authority,  nor  disrespect  to  my 
uncle's  advice — but  I  had  so  hoped 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT    43 

Mrs.  Washixgton. 

Be  seated,  my  son !  [Geokge  obeys.]  Two  years  ago 
your  father  was  taken  from  us,  leaving  me  with  five  chil- 
dren to  bring  up.  You  are  my  eldest.  Y'ou  are  almost  a 
man!     Why,  this  very  day  you  are  fifteen  I 

George. 

I  understand,  madam.     Y^et — I  own — a  sailor's  life — 

adventure !     [Goes  hurriedly  to  the  wi?idow.'\     Pray 

believe  that — I  obey  you — ch — eh — cheerfully! 

Mrs.  Washington. 
[To  herself.]     My  good  lad! 

Lord  Fairfax. 

[Outside.]  Halloa,  halloa,  there !  Y"ou  lazy  black  ras- 
cals I 

Mrs.  Washington. 
Who  comes? 

George. 

Lord  Fairfax ! 


44  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Mrs.   WASHINGfTON. 

Lord  Fairfax !  Aye,  I  hear  that  he  has  come  from  Lon- 
don to  visit  his  estates!  Go  wait  on  his  lordship!  Nay; 
you're  disordered  with  your  ride.  Go  make  yourself  fit  to 
be  seen! 

Servant. 

[At  the  first  door  announces.']     Lord  Fairfax ! 
[George  goes  by  the  second  door.] 

Lord  Fairfax. 
[Enters,  hows  low.]     Mrs.  Washington ! 

Mrs.  Washington. 
[Curtseys  low.]     Welcome,  Lord  Fairfax ;  welcome ! 

Lord  Fairfax. 

I  thank  you,  madam.  Indeed  welcome  never  seems  to 
fail  in  hospitable  Virginia ! 

[The  Servant  places  chairs.    They  sit.] 

Mrs.  Washington. 

[To  Servant.]   Set  another  place  at  table,  and 

[Whispers  and  gives  Servant  her  keys.  Servant  hoios 
and  goes  by  second  door.] 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     45 

Lord  Fairfax. 

I  rode  over  to  pay  my  respects — our  families  are  con- 
nected by  marriage ! 

Mrs.  Washixgtois\ 
Your  courtesy  needs  no  such  excuse!     [Both  bow.] 

Lord  Fairfax. 

Also  I  am  much  interested  in  what  my  kinsman,  Wil- 
liam Fairfax,  tells  me  of  your  eldest  son. 

Mrs.  Washington. 
[Primly.]     George  is  a  good  lad,  my  lord ! 

Lord  Fairfax. 
That  and  more,  I'm  told.    A  youth  of  parts  and  spirit ! 

Mrs.  Washington. 

[With  sudden  eloquence.]  Indeed,  sir,  though  I  would 
not  have  him  hear  me  praise  him,  George  is  something 
quite  out  of  the  common !  Hobby,  the  sexton,  who  taught 
him  to  write,  said  there  never  was  such  a  little  fist  for  pot- 
hooks !  He  can  ride  with  the  best.  He's  a  perfect  marks- 
man. He  can  wrestle,  leap  and  throw!  Why,  he  can 
throw  a  stone  clear  across  the  Rappahannock — and  you  can 
see  for  yourself  how  wide  it  runs  between  our  meadows 
and  Fredericksburg  on  the  opposite  shore.  George 
has  formed  a  little' company  of  his  schoolfellows  and  drills 


46  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

them  in  militar}^  exercises !  Many  of  them  are  much  older, 
but  they  all  obey  him.  Somehow  George  always  leads. 
He  has  a  way  of  getting  do^vn  to  the  rights  of  things,  and 
so  they  trust  him,  because  it  is  for  the  sake  of  having 
things  right,  and  not  for  himself!  While  Mr.  Washing- 
ton lived  lie  was  most  attentive  to  George's  education,  but 
now  George  goes  to  school  with  Mr.  Williams.  Here  are 
his  books !  Y^ou  can  see  the  orderly  way  he  keeps  them ! 
[Shows  boohs.] 

Lord  Fairfax. 

[Examining  the  hoohs.]  A  clear,  firm  hand.  Arith- 
metic, geometry.  Copies  of  indentures,  bonds,  leases. 
Elements  of  surveying.  Selections  of  rhyme,  and — what  is 
this!  An  original  sentiment!  "Labor  to  keep  alive  in 
your  breast  that  little  spark  of  celestial  fire  called  con- 
science V 

Mrs.  Washixgton. 
Aye  !     And  that  is  my  George  ! 

Lord  Fairfax. 

But  may  I  not  meet  this  young  gentleman? 

Mrs.  Washington. 

He  will  wait  on  your  lordship  directly.  I  sent  him  to 
wash  the  tear  stains  from  his  face ! 

Lord  Fairfax. 

Tear  stains?  This  precocious  youth!  This  model  of 
discretion !     Tears ! 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     47 

Mps.  Washixgtox. 

[Nods  yes.]  Though  he  never  would  forgive  me  for 
noticing  them  I  His  heart  was  set  on  going  to  sea,  for  the 
adventure  of  it ! 

Lord  Fairfax. 

But  are  there  obstacles?  I  am  not  without  influence. 
A  midshipman's  commission  can  easily  be  procured  for 
him. 

Mrs.  Washington. 

Oh,  sir !  Pray  hold  not  out  so  great  a  lure !  You  see 
he  is  my  first-born — and  though  I  would  not  have  him 
know  it,  the  apple  of  my  eye !  Think  what  might  not  hap- 
pen to  him  at  sea  !    The  wind — the  waves — and  the  French  ! 

Lord  Fairfax. 
I  understand ! 

George. 

[Enters.]  My  Lord  Fairfax!  [Bows  low.]  Y^our 
servant,  sir! 

Lord  Fairfax. 

[ShaJces  hands  with  George.]  I  have  heard  much  of  you, 
sir,  from  my  kinsman,  William,  and  from  your  esteemed 
half-brother,  Mr.  Lawrence  Washington! 


48  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

George. 

I  am  obliged  for  their  good  opinion,  sir,  and  for  j^our 
lordship's  kindness. 

Lord  Fairfax. 
I  hear  you  are  a  keen  huntsman ! 

George. 

Oh,  sir !  Only  to-day  I  catched  a  fox — not  the  common 
gray  kind,  but  a  big  black  one.  Will  your  lordship  allow 
me  to  present  you  with  the  brush? 

Lord  Fairfax. 

I  thank  you,  sir !  We  must  have  some  rides  together ! 
I,  too,  am  untiring  in  the  saddle.  Oh,  and  if  you  are  fond 
of  reading  pray  make  all  use  of  my  library  at  Belvoir  ! 


George. 
I  know  not  how  to  thank  your  lordship ! 

Lord  Fairfax. 

Oh,  and,  by  the  way,  your  mother  tells  me  you  are  in- 
terested in  surveying.  When  you  shall  have  mastered  it 
1  shall  do  myself  the  pleasure  of  giving  you  your  first  com- 
mission— to  make  maps  and  define  boundaries  of  my  pos- 
sessions beyond  the  Blue  Ridge ! 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     49 

George. 

Oh,  sir !  How  can  I  thank  you  I  Mother,  do  you  hear 
that ! 

Mrs.  Washixgtox. 
Your  lordship  is  most  kind ! 

Servant. 
lAt  second  door.l     Dinner  is  served,  madam! 

Mrs.  Washixgtox. 
Come,  sir.    Y'ou  must  be  famished  after  your  ride ! 

Lord  Fairfax. 

[Giving  his  arm  to  Mrs.  Washixgtox'.]  We'll  drink 
to  the  health  of  my  new  surveyor !  Y'ou'll  find  there  are 
adventures  a-plenty  by  land  as  well  as  by  sea,  George ! 

George. 

Lord  Fairfax — who  told  you —  I  [Lord  Fairfax  laiigJis, 
goes  out  with  Mrs.  Washixgtox  hy  second  door.  George 
is  about  to  follouj,  when  with  a  sudden  impulse  he  turns 
hack  and  blows  a  kiss  out  of  window.}  0  river!  Bear  my 
good-bye  to  the  sea !  To  the  sea  of  my  dreams — to  my 
dreams  of  the  sea  I  I'm  fifteen  now — almost  a  man !  I 
must  put  my  dreams  behind  my  duty ! 


50  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Mrs.  WASHIXGT0J7. 
[Looks  in.]     Where  is  mv  son? 

Lord  Fairfax. 
[Looks  in.]     Where  is  my  surveyor? 

George. 
Sir,  madarQ,  I  come ! 

Mrs.  Washington. 

He  is  a  good  boy,  sir.    He  will  do  his  duty ! 
[All  pass  out.] 

Irvixg. 

[Rousing  himself,  rises,  and  walks  about.]  Washington 
the  trusted  surveyor — leader  of  the  Virginia  forces — aide — 
trusted  ambassador  of  Dinwiddle  to  the  French  on  La 
Belle  Riviere — commended  in  the  house  of  Burgesses — in 
the  English  Parliament !  Gallant  aide  to  Braddock.  Then 
when  the  Revolutionary  storm  broke  forth,  chosen  against 
his  will  to  lead  what  might,  but  for  him,  have  proved  the 
forlornest  of  forlorn  hopes,  lost  causes !  The  iron  will,  the 
tact,  that  held  the  army  together — that  wonderful  year's 
work  in  the  Jerseys — that  cruel  winter  at  Yalley  Forge 
!     [Sits  again,  and  muses.] 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     51 


SCEXE  II. 


Washington. 

[Enters  first  door  with  preoccupied  mojiner.  Speaks 
to  himself  while  removing  military  cloak  and  hat.]  Which 
way  to  turn  for  succor  I  An  incompetent  Congress,  an  in- 
different people,  a  starving  army!  Whence  shall  I  seek 
aid !    [Goes  out  hy  second  door,  talcing  cloak  and  hat.'} 

Mary. 

[At  first  door  with  sprig  of  pine.]  General  I  General 
Washington !  I've  brought  you  a  birthday  present !  [Not 
seeing  him  she  goes  to  second  door,  opens  it,  closes  it  very 
softly.] 

Billy. 

[Entering  first  door,  sees  her.]  Dat's  right,  li'l  Miss 
Ma'y !  I  declar  if  it  wasn't  f o'  yo'  an'  me  de  Gen'l  ud  get 
no  rest  at  all,  what  wiv  his  officers  pestring  ter  know  what 
ter  do  every  time  de  enemy  done  pokes  his  nose  roun'  de 
cornah !    No  rest  at  all !    Nossuh  ! 

[Col.  Fitzgerald  and  Dr.  Craik  have  entered,  first 
door,  during  this.     They  now  laugh.] 

Dr.  Craik. 

Bravo,  Billy  1     Well  said ! 


52  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Billy. 

Yo'  pahd'n,  gen'lmen,  but  de  Gen'l  he  don't  get  no 
rest 

ElTZGERALD. 

True!  Yet  since  he  may  need  me — Sentry,  mayn't  I 
pass  the  line?  I  can  giv^e  the  countersign.  Victory  or 
Death !  [Mary  shakes  head  no.]  Come,  not  for  a  present 
and  a  kiss? 

Mary. 

Only  across  my  prostrate  body !  [All  laugh.  Billy  goes 
off,  first  door,  chucMing .] 


Dr.  Craik. 

Ha,  ha !  I  always  knew  my  friend's  presence  to  create 
a  sentimental  disorder  among  the  caps,  but  this  devo- 
tion of  our  little  neighbor  passes  all. 

Fitzgerald. 

He  works,  planning,  writing  to  Congress,  till  liis  taper 
burns  out,  each  night!  Let  him  sleep  awhile!  [Goes  to 
vjindow.']  Halloa!  White  and  scarlet  liveries  !  'Tis  Mrs. 
Washington ! 

Dr.  Craik. 

Aye !  I  would  say,  let  us  go  hand  her  from  her  coach, 
but  that  we  are  anticipated  by  two  pretty  sprigs.  Colonel 
Hamilton  and  the  Marquis  de  Lafayette ! 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT    53 
Fitzgerald. 

Also,  I  see  the  wives  of  Generals  Greene  and  Knos  are 
here  to  \\-elcome  her! 

Billy. 
[At  first  door  announces.]    Mrs.  Washington !    Go  right 

'"'  ^[Mr^  Washington  enters  with  Mrs.  Greene  and 
Fairfax.] 

Fitzgerald  and  Dr.  Craik. 
[Saluting.]     Mrs.  WasHngton!     Ladies! 

Mrs.  Washington. 
[Cordially,  a  Mud  to  each.]     Colonel  Fitzgerald!    Dr. 
Craik! 

Fitzgerald. 

This  is  an  agreeable  surprise,  madam!     The  General 
looked  not  for  you  till  to-morrow! 

Mrs.  Washington. 

I  stole  a  day's  march  on  him,  to  join  him  on  his  birth- 
day! Our  neW>  Mr.  Bryan  Fairfa.  of  Belvo.r,  nd 
with  me!  [All  acknowledge  the  introduction.]  Is  Mr. 
Washington  within? 


54  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Fitzgerald. 

Aye,  madam,  but  it  is  a  life's  purchase  to  pass  the  guard ! 

Mrs.  Washixgtox. 

Why,  what  is  this,  my  pretty  dear?  [Mary  taps  lips.] 
So  ?  He  sleeps  ?  I  love  thy  loyalty !  Give  notice  when  he 
stirs.  [>Si75.]  Meanwhile,  gentlemen,  you  who  are  so  near 
to  him,  talk  to  me  of  my  husband  I  His  rule,  as  you  know, 
is  no  women  in  camp  during  action !  I  only  hear  the  clos- 
ing shot  of  one  campaign,  the  opening  of  the  next !  The 
anxious  interval  we  wives  must  spend  at  home,  waiting  for 
news,  eh,  ladies  ?  [The  ladies  assent.']  Of  the  movements 
of  the  army  Mr.  Washington  keeps  me  fully  posted,  but  the 
best  and  the  worst,  his  triumphs  and  sufferings,  I  only 
learn  from  others ! 

Mrs.  Greexe. 

[.4/50  seated.]  Sometime,  madam,  you  must  let  me  read 
you  passages  from  General  Greene's  letters!  When  3'ou 
hear  how  General  Washington  made  them  cross  the  Dela- 
ware you'll  both  laugh  and  cry! 

Mrs.  Kxox. 

Did  you  hear,  madam,  how  the  General  rallied  his  of- 
ficers at  Trenton  when  their  spirits  flagged?  Giving  the 
view-halloo  he  brandished  his  sword,  and  spurred  his  horse, 
crying,  Forward,  gentlemen,  for  an  old-fashioned  Virginia 
fox-hunt !    Forward  !  Hal -loo  !     [All  applaud.] 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     55 

Fitzgerald. 

Madam,  there  is  a  serious  complaint  against  the  General 
in  the  army! 

Mrs.  Washington^ 

[With  spirit.']     A  complaint,  sir!     And  that  is ? 

Nay,  tell  me  not !    I  hear  no  complaints  of  Mr.  Washing- 
ton!    [All  applaud.] 

Fitzgerald. 

Madam,  it  is  but  that  he  exposes  himself  to  danger  all 
too  recklessly !  When  the  battle  halts,  the  soldiers  falter— 
he  gallops  to  the  fore,  and— Well,  at  Princeton  I  dropped 
my  reins  on  my  horse's  neck  and  drew  my  hat  down  over 
my  face !  I  could  not  bear  to  see  my  beloved  commander  die ! 
[With  emotion.    All  murmur  sympathy.] 

Fairfax. 

Have  you  never  heard— when  he  was  but  a  youth  cam- 
paigning with  Braddock,  horses  were  shot  under  him,  bul- 
lets pierced  his  coat— but  never  a  hair  of  his  head  was 
scathed !  Twas  then  the  Indians  said  he  was  under  pro- 
tection of  the  Great  Spirit,  leading  a  charmed  life,  and 
would  some  day  be  hailed  as  founder  of  a  mighty  empire ! 

Fitzgerald. 
God  grant  it  prove  so! 


56  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

All. 
Amen ! 

Mary. 
You  ma}^  go  in  now !     The  General  says  Amen ! 

Mrs.  Washington. 

Lead  the  way,  child  !  Come,  Mr.  Fairfax ;  we'll  surprise 
him ! 

[Mrs.  Washington,  Fairfax,  and  Mary  go  hy  sec- 
ond door,  Mrs.  Greene  and  Mrs.  Knox  exchange 
glances  as  if  to  say.  Let  us  retire  for  the  present,  and 
go  by  first  door.] 

Fitzgerald. 

The  General  says  Amen!  One  might  have  known  it 
would  be  either  work  or  prayer,  not  sleep,  that  engaged 
him  at  a  crisis ! 

Dr.  Craik. 
A  crisis?     Anything  fresh? 

Fitzgerald. 

Only  the  wonted  barrel  of  gunpowder  on  which  we  live ! 
Troops  on  the  verge  of  mutiny,  officers  desirous  of  resign- 
ing!   As  for  Congress 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     57 

Dr.  Craik. 

[Hands  raised,]  Congress !  Only  ten  or  twelve  mem- 
bers to  be  got  together  for  a  session !  The  rest  at  home 
minding  their  own  personal  or  State  affairs !  Few  are  there 
who  are  patriotic  enough  to  echo  Patrick  Henry's  noble 
words,  At  a  national  crisis  I  am  no  longer  a  Virginian;  I 
am  an  American! 

Fitzgerald. 

True !  And  now  there's  a  conspiracy  to  displace  Wash- 
ington and  put  Gates  in  his  stead ! 

Dr.  Craik. 

[Hands  raised.]  Gates!  Gates  for  Washington !  After 
Princeton,  too !  Why,  von  Steuben  says  the  Germans  call 
Washington's  work  in  the  Jerseys  the  greatest  campaign 
of  the  century ! 

Fitzgerald. 

But  I  wonder  if  ever  the  day  will  come  when  his  own 

people  understand  how  truly  great  he  is ! 

[Enter,  by  second  door,  Washington,  Mrs.  Washing- 
ton,, Fairfax,  and  Mary,  who  holds  Washington's 
hand,  ivhile  he  wears  her  sprig  of  pine.] 

Washington. 

Gentlemen,  I  have  kept  you  overlong !  Bryan  Fairfax, 
old  friend,  give  my  lady  your  arm  to  see  Baron  von  Steu- 
ben's drill.    He  is  working  wonders  with  our  soldiery ! 


58  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Fitzgerald. 

And  you  might  add,  sir,  with  many  of  our  officers ! 

Dr.  Craik. 
But  how's  this  ?    I  thought  Mr.  Fairfax  to  be  a  loyalist ! 

Fairfax. 

True,  doctor !  My  principles  forbid  my  abjuring  allegi- 
ance to  Great  Britain — my  mother  country ! 

Washington. 

And  his  heart  prevents  him  from  bearing  arms  against 
his  brothers,  the  Provincials,  eh,  Bryan? 

Fairfax. 

The  case  in  a  nutshell,  George ! 

Washington. 

My  dear  Patsy,  I  must  warn  you  that  the  Baron,  though 
the  most  high-minded  of  gentlemen,  when  out  of  patience 
with  our  raw  recruits  is  like  to — Ahem ! 

Fitzgerald. 
Ahem! 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     59 

Dr.  Craik. 
[Haiids  raised.]    Ahem ! 


Ahem! 


Mrs.  Washixgtox. 


Washington. 


In  three  languages!  [All  laugh.  Mrs.  Washixgtox, 
Fairfax  and  the  child  go  by  the  first  door.']  Well,  friends, 
cf  course  the  old  story  about  the  alarming  situation  of  our 
army !    But — any  new  counsels,  fresh  remedies  to  advise  ? 

Fitzgerald. 

Oh,  sir,  for  those  we  always  come  to  you ! 

Washington. 
But,  first — Doctor,  you  come  recently  from  the  seat  of 
Congress  ? 

Dr.  Craik. 

[Hands  raised.]  Congress!  The  majority  think  our 
cause  is  lost  because  General  Howe  has  taken  Philadelphia  ! 

Washington. 

Or,  rather,  as  Mr.  Franklin  put  it,  Philadelphia  has 
taken  General  Howe !  Long  may  he  remain  there,  enjoy- 
ing its  hospitalities  while  we  get  our  wretched  forces  into 
some  sort  of  shape !    Did  we  expose  our  weakness  at  this 


60  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

moment — three  thousand  men  in  hospital,  barely  eight 
thousand  men,  and  those  miserably  equipped,  on  our  rolls — ! 
Why,  friends,  had  the  British  known  that  at  Bunker  Hill 
the  Americans  had  but  nine  cartridges  to  a  man  they  would 
have  made  a  second  onset  that  would  simply  have  anni- 
hilated our  army ! 

Dr.  Craik. 

True,  sir!  And  yet —  'Tis  not  my  own  opinion,  which 
ever  coincides  with  yours — but  there  are  those  who  clamor 
for  a  short  war  and  violent! 


Washington". 

A  short  war  and  violent !  How  easy  to  drink  the  toast 
in  a  comfortable  room  by  a  warm  fireside !  While  we — 
Billy!    Billy! 

Billy. 

[Appears  at  first  door.]     Yes,  Gen'l? 

Washington. 

[Looking  out  of  window.]  Two  soldiers  are  passing. 
Bring  them  in  here  to  me ! 

Billy. 
Aye,  Gen'l !    [Goes  out,  first  door.] 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     61 

Washixgtox. 

An  army  of  farmers'  boys,  more  skilled  with  pick  and 
plough  than  musket !  Pitted  against  the  most  splendidly 
drilled,  bravest  soldiery  on  earth,  and  people  call  for  a  short 

war,  and [Brealcs  off  as  Billy  ushers  in  two  soldiers. 

One,  an  elderly  man,  is  emaciated.  The  younger  is  ragged 
arid  almost  barefoot.  They  salute.  Washington  looks  at 
them,  then  addresses  the  elder.]  How  long  since  you  tasted 
bread  ? 

1st  Soldier. 
Two  days,  sir! 

Washington. 

But  you've  had  meat! 

1st  Soldiee. 
A  morsel  or  so,  sir  1 

Washington. 
And  before  that ? 

1st  Soldier. 
Bread  and  no  meat,  sir ! 

Washington. 
[To  the  younger.']    Do  you  sleep  warm  by  night? 


(12  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

2xD  Soldier. 

When  it  is  m}^  turn  for  the  blanket,  sir !  You  know  in 
our  company  the  men  take  turns,  one  sits  by  the  fire  one 
night,  the  other  he  sleeps  in  the  blanket 

Washington. 

On  the  frozen  ground,  eh?  [The  hoij  nods  ^■"5.]  But 
you're  ready  to  fight,  eh,  boys? 

Both. 
Aye,  aye,  sir!     [With  enthusmsm.'] 

1st  Soldier. 
Fighting  is  easier  than  starving,  your  Honor! 

2xD  Soldier. 
It  warms  up  the  blood,  }'our  Excellency ! 

Washixgtox. 
Don't  lose  heart,  boys !     Better  times  are  coming  I 

1st  Soldier. 

Y^our  Honor  pledged  your  o\mi  private  fortune  for  our 
pay — and  we  trust  you 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT    63 

2xD  Soldier. 
Aye,  that  do  we — to  the  death! 

Washington. 

Trust  in  God  and  a  good  cause,  boys!     The  lives  and 
liberties  of  three  million  people  depend  on  you! 

Soldiers. 

Aye,  aye,  sir  !     God  bless  your  Honor  ! 

[They  salute  and  go,  first  door.    All  are  profoundly 
affected.'] 

Washixgtox. 

My  men  marked  the  road  to  the  camp  here  in  Valley 
Forge  with  bloody  footprints  from  their  naked  feet !    And 
the  commissary  department  writes  me  daily  that  supplies 
are  on  the  way — on  the  way — forever  on  the  way ! 
[Shouts  and  cheering  outside.'] 

Mrs.  Washington. 

[Running  in  'by  first  door.]     Oh,  George!     A  train  of 
supplies  has  at  last  arrived ! 

Washington. 
Thank  God ! 

The  Others. 
Amen ! 

[Ladies  and  gentlemen  troop  in  by  first  door.] 


04  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Billy. 
[At  second  door.']     Dinner  is  served,  Gen'l ! 

"Washixgtox. 

All  my  military  family  must  dine  with  me  to-night! 
Come,  ladies  and  gentlemen — Well  drink  to 

All. 

[Interrupting  with  laughter.]     To  Washington! 

Washixgtox. 

Xo,  no.    To  victory,  and  then  to  Peace ! 

[All  go  hy  second  door.     Ha:\iiltox  detains  Lafay- 
ette.] 

Hamilton. 

Tell  me,  Marquis — our  Commander,  is  he  not  as  I  de- 
scribed him? 

Lafayette. 

[Xods  assent.]  Of  men  the  most  great,  the  most  su- 
perb !  But,  Colonel  Hamilton,  I  paused  at  Fredericksburg 
to  do  homage  to  his  mother,  the  venerable  Mrs.  Washing- 
ton !  But,  when  I  would  have  sung  his  praises  she  cut  me 
short,  sa^-ing,  "Oh,  sir,  I  am  not  surprised  at  what  my  son 
has  done  !  George  was  always  a  good  boy !  He  would  not 
fail  to  do  his  duty !  [They  laugh  and  follow  the  others  out 
by  second  door.] 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     65 

Irving. 

[Rousing  himself  again  from  his  reverie,  moves  about.'] 
Then  the  triumph,  the  hard-won  victory !  The  farewell 
to  his  army  at  Annapolis !  Home  again  at  last  but  to  be 
drawn  from  home  to  the  presidential  chair  I  The  splendid 
statesmanship — the  genius  for  reconciliation — and  always 
the  same  just,  modest,  unassuming  gentleman  I    And  then 

those  last  days   at  Mt.   Vernon [Sits  again,   lost   in 

thought.] 


Scene  III. 

[Colonel  Leak  enters  with  posthag,  and  proceeds  to 
sort  its  contents.  Mks.  Washington  enters,  with 
worhbasket,  by  first  door.] 

Mrs.  Washington. 

George !  Are  you  here,  my  love  ?  Oh,  Colonel  Lear,  has 
not  Mr.  Washington  returned  from  his  ride? 

Leak. 
Not  yet,  madam ! 

Nellie. 

[Has  follovjed  Mrs.  Washington  in.]  I  trust  he  won't 
be  late.  This  is  the  last  day  I  shall  have  him  and  you  all 
to  myself,  dear  Grandmamma !  [Placing  chair  for  Mrs. 
Washington  by  window.] 


66  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Mrs.  Wasiiixgton. 

But,  my  child,  you  and  Lawrence  will  continue  to  make 
your  home  here  at  Mt.  Vernon !  Mr.  Washington  and  I  are 
growing  old,  and  we  need  you ! 


Xellie. 

Fortunately  for  me,  madam  I  Indeed,  had  marriage  in- 
volved my  leaving  you,  my  answer  must  have  been  no,  even 
to  Major  Lewis ! 

Lewis. 

[At  first  door,  having  overheard.]  Had  marriage  in- 
volved my  leaving  you  and  my  uncle,  madam,  I  could  not 
have  been  tempted  to  it,  even  by  sweet  Xellie  Custis  !  [Boies, 
while  Xellie  curtseys.] 

Mrs.  Washixgtox. 

[At  window,  waves.]  Here  comes  he  now !  That  drab 
riding  suit  of  his  grows  shabby  ! 

Xellie. 
[Also  at  window.]     Aye,  but  how  well  he  looks ! 


Mrs.  Washington. 

Oh,  my  dear,  ^tis  conceded  that  no  one  ever  looked  so 
v>'ell  on  horseback  as  ^Ir.  Washington  I 

[Washington  enters,  first  door.     General  greetings.] 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     67 

Mrs.  Washington. 

Did  you  enjoy  your  ride,  my  love  ? 

Washington. 

As  usual,  my  dearest.  Only— I  rid  in  the  direction  of 
Belvoir  !    How  I  miss  the  Fairfaxes  !— Well,  my  children? 

Nellie. 

Sir,  T  should  chide  you  for  being  late  on  my  wedding 
day,  but  that  you  would  quote  to  me  your  watch  which  you 
set  by  the  sundial. 

Washington. 

Which,  you  will  grant,  is  faithful  to  the  sun !  Well,  Mr. 
Lear,  what  brings  the  post  to-day? 

Lear. 

The  wonted  batch,  your  Excellency.  Many  applications 
for  your  influence  in  obtaining  positions  in  the  event  of  a 
war  with  France ! 

Washington. 

Alack!  Shall  I  ever  have  leisure  to  look  into  a  book 
again— unless  it  be  the  Domesday  Book? 


68  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


Xellie. 


I  protest.  For  3^ears  your  birthday  has  been  a  general 
holiday. 

Washington. 

[LaugJis.]     For  every  one  except  the  General  I 

Xellie. 

But  to-day — Mr.  Lear,  pray  put  by  such  letters  as  you 
yourself  cannot  attend  to ! 

Washington. 

To-day — well,  to-day  we  will  oblige  Miss  Custis,  Mr. 
Lear. 

Lear. 
Very  well,  sir !     [Takes  posthag  out  hy  second  door.'] 

Mrs.  Washington. 
\_At  window.']     Visitors! 

Lewis. 
ril  receive  them  for  you,  sir  I     [Goes  hy  first  door.] 

Nellie. 

Let  us  change  good  wishes.  But  first  tell  me,  have  you 
always  worn  this  miniature  of  my  grandmamma  upon  your 
heart  ? 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT    69 

Washington. 
Always  since   the   original   took   up  permanent   abode 
within. 

Xellie. 

Then  wish  me  this,  that  Lawrence  and  I  may  always  be 
as  happy  as  you  two ! 

Washington. 
Gladly,  my  child ! 

Xellie. 
But  what  can  I  wish  you?      You're  the  best  beloved 
man  in  the  country-the  most  famous  living  I    [^^  ashing- 
"on  protests.^     Yes,  you  are,  is  it  not  so,  grandmamma  ^ 

Then 

Washington. 

At  sixty-seven  one  might  wish  for  peace! 

Lear. 
lAt  second  door.-]     Will  your  Excellency  frank  these 
letters?     ^^lay  he,  Miss  Custis? 

Xellie. 
On  reflection,  yes,  because  he  would  accept  no  pay  for 
his  services  in  the  Eevolution,  nor  as  President    \  enlj  free 
postage  is  all  he  ever  has  taken  from  his  country! 


i^^^^H^fe 


HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


Lear. 


And  without  that  he'd  be  bankrupt  in  a  twelvemonth! 
[Washixgtox  goes  vsith  him  by  second  door.] 


Xellie. 
Grandma'  I    Aren't  you  the  proudest  woman  ? 

Mrs.  Washixgtox. 

Ah,  my  dear,  when  Mr.  Washington  has  been  absent  from 
me  I  have  always  been  too  anxious  for  pride.  And  when 
he  is  with  me  I  am  too  content ! 

Xellie. 

But  surely  there's  something — some  one  little  thing  about 
which,  in  your  inmost  heart,  you  feel  inclined  to  brag  I 

Mrs.  Washixgtox'. 

[Puts  down  tvorJc]  Oh,  Xellie,  if  I  had  to  choose — ! 
Y^es.  'Tis  this:  that  at  West  India  ports  any  barrel  of 
flour  is  exempt  from  the  customary  inspection  provided  it 
bears  the  brand,  George  Washington,  Mt.  A'ernon ! 

[Xellie  claps  hands.     Washix'Gtox'  enters,  second 
door,  Lewis  by  first.] 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     71 

Lewis. 

A  delegation  of  Indians,  sir,  Hodenosaunee,  or  the  Tribe 
of  the  Long  House,  as  the  H}Toquois  call  themselves.  They 
come  to  thank  yon  for  your  benevolent  intercession  in  their 
behalf,  and  to  inform  you  that  Harodeganears,  as  they  call 
you,  is  the  only  white  man  who  will  be  admitted  to  the  red 
man's  heaven !  [Nellie  applauds.']  I  have  set  them  down 
to  refreshments  I 

WASHIXGTO^'■. 

Good.  Later  I  will  go  smoke  the  pipe  of  peace  with 
them!  If  only  I  loved  the  pipe  as  much  as  I  do  peace! 
[All  laugh.]  My  dear,  I  have  a  plan  to  discuss  with  them 
— to  interest  Congress  in  teaching  the  Indians  agriculture — 
can  they  remain  with  us  a  few  days? 

Mbs.  Washingtox. 
Surely.     They  will  be  most  welcome! 

Billy. 

[At  first  door  announces.]  Mr.  George  Washington  La- 
fayette ! 

Washixgton, 

George  Lafayette!  Show  him  in,  Billy!  He  is  most 
welcome ! 


72  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Xellie. 

[Laughs.]     And  of  course  he'll  remain  with  us  a  few 
days ! 

George  Washixgtox  Lafayette. 

[Enters,  first  door,  hows  low.']     Sir;  madam;  Miss  Cus- 
tis !     Major  Lewis. 

"Washixgtox. 

Welcome  to  your  father's  son,  dear  George ! 
[The  others  also  greet  him.] 


George  Washixgtox  Lafayette. 

I  come,  sir,  to  pay  my  respects  to  you  before  I  return  to 
France. 

Mrs.  Washixgtox. 
Y^ou  are  returninof  to  France,  sir? 


George  Washixgtox  Lafayette. 

[Boii's.]  To  embrace  my  beloved  father,  madam.  Xa- 
poleon,  as  you  know,  has  recently  procured  his  release  from 
captivity!  As  my  father  writes,  "The  Corsican  calls  me 
a  noodle,  but  procures  my  liberty !"    [All  laugh.] 

Washixgtox. 

Great  general  as  he  is,  Bonaparte  cannot  understand  a 
m.an's  dedicatincr  his  sword  to  an  ideal ! 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     73 

George  Washington  Lafayette. 
While  this  country  is  a  monument  to  liberty ! 

Washington. 

Ah,  sir,  we  are  not  faultless  in  that  respect— not  while 
we  proclaim  all  men  free  and  equal,  yet  enslave  our  fellow- 
man  because,  forsooth,  he  hath  a  colored  skin!  Born  a 
slave-holder,  I  should  long  since  have  freed  my  slaves  but 
for  the  complications  this  would  cause,  to  their  own  disad- 
vantage. But,  as  my  dear  lady  yonder  knows,  my  will  gives 
them°all  their  freedom,  with  provision  for  those  to  whom 
freedom  would  spell  beggary !  Some  day  I  trust  the  Legis- 
lature will  bring  about  a  change  in  tliis  respect !  Then  only 
will  the  liberty  for  which  we  fought  be  truly  realized ! 

Billy. 

[Who  lias  entered  on  the  words,  ''a  colored  shin/'  at  first 
door.']  Ahem.  Gen'l !  Two  ole  soldiers  wishes  to  pay  their 
specks  to  yo'  an'  Lady  Washington.  Says  dey's  pussonally 
'quainted  wiv  yo' !  An'  I  reckon  dat's  de  troof,  Massa 
George,  case  I  fetched  'em  to  yo'  mahself  at  Valley  Forge! 

Washington. 
Valley  Forge!     Of  course  I  remember  them! 


74  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


Mrs.  Washixgtox. 

Valley  Forge !     Of  course  they're  welcome  I     Set  them 
down  to  refreshments,  Billy ! 

Billy. 
Dat's  what  I  sholy  done,  ma'am  I     l^essuh  I 

Xellie. 

And  of  course  they'll  remain  with  us  a  few  days  I  [All 
laugh.1 

Billy. 

[Has  lingered  hy  door.]  Ahem !  Gen'l !  Which  uni- 
form will  yo'  wear  fo^  Miss  Xellie's  weddin'? 

Xellie. 

Which  uniform  ?  Why,  of  course  the  grand  new  one  that 
he"6  just  had  sent  home  in  case  of  a  war  with  France ! 

Washixgtox. 

War  I  If  my  country  needs  me  I  must  not  intrench  my- 
self under  cover  of  age  and  retirement.  But  meantime  let 
us  pray  that  there  may  be  no  war !  War  at  best  is  but  a 
sword  sheathed  in  a  brother's  breast  I  [All  murmur  assent.] 
The  old  buff  and  blue  uniform,  Billy,  that  has  seen  real 
service,  and  stands  for  war  put  by  I 


A  WASHINGTON'S  BIRTHDAY  PAGEANT     75 

Mrs.  Washixctox. 
Aye,  the  dear  old  buff  and  blue  I     That's  the  best : 

Billy. 

Dat's  what  I  done  put  out  fo'  you,  Gen'l !  Yessuhl  [AU 
laugh.] 

Nellie. 

The  buff  and  blue — on  second  thoughts  I  love  you  best 
in  that,  sir ! 

Washixgtox. 

[Gives  Mrs.  Washington  his  arm  and  leads  toward  sec- 
ond door,  which  Billy  hastens  to  open  for  them.]  Come; 
haste !  Get  ready  for  the  wedding.  And  then  we'll  drink 
our  wonted  toast,  "To  all  our  friends,  and  to  the  world's 
lasting  peace !" 

All. 

[Following,  repeat.']  To  all  our  friends,  and  to  the 
world's  lasting  peace  I     [All  go  out  hij  second  door.] 

Irvixg. 

[Rousing  himself  from  reverie.]  Then,  when  he  passed 
on  to  the  land  of  departed  spirits,  his  country  knew  him  for 
his  true  worth.     The  world  mourned  him.     Great  Britain 


76  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

lowered  her  flags  to  half  mast  for  him.  iSTapoleon  twined 
crepe  with  the  standards  of  France.  The  nation  he,  more 
than  all  others,  had  helped  to  found,  acclaimed  him  first  in 
war,  first  in  peace,  and  first  in  the  hearts  of  his  country- 
men !  But  I  think  his  old  mother,  looking  down,  may  have 
exclaimed,  '^Enough  of  praise,  gentlemen !  George  always 
was  a  good  boy!  George  would  be  sure  to  have  done  his 
duty!"    [H"e  goes  Old  ly  second  door.'] 


THE  FIRST  FLAG 


Fourth  of  July 


mmmm 


To  Janet  E.  E. 

AXD   ALL    HAXDMAIDEXS    OF   THE    STARS. 


THE  FIRST  FLAG 

Characters. 

General  George  Washington,  Colonel  George  Ross,  Mr. 
Robert  Morris,  Madam  Martha  Washington,  Mrs.  Elizabeth 
Ross,  Sarah  Griscom,  and  George,  a  child.  The  men  and 
Madam  Washington  are  in  the  early  forties,  Elizabeth  and 
Sarah  in  the  early  twenties. 

Scene. 

A  workroom  behind  the  upholstery  shop  of  Mrs.  Ross 
on  Arch  Street,  Philadelphia. 

Time. 
The  end  of  May  or  beginning  of  June,  A.  D.  1776. 

Costumes. 
Suited  to  the  period,  season,  occasion  and  character. 

Stage-Settixg. 

Two  doors,  one  leading  into  the  shop,  the  other  to  a 
passage.  A  window  overlooks  the  back  garden.  Shelf  with 
bandboxes,  etc.    Work-table  with  work  materials,  including 


80  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

several  pairs  of  scissors,  sheets  of  paper,  etc.  Samples  of 
work  on  walls.  Plain  furniture  of  the  period.  A  bell,  sup- 
posed to  be  on  the  door  leading  from  the  shop  to  the  street 
must  ring  whenever  an}-  one  goes  in  or  out  of  the  shop. 
The  paper  must  be  of  the  dimensions  required  for  making 
the  stars — 3  by  4.  A  completed  flag  must  be  substituted 
at  close  for  the  sample  brought  by  Washington. 


Discovered : 

[Elizabeth^  busily  repairing  a  sumptuous  hall-dress 
of  the  period.  Shop-hell  rings.  She  puts  down 
work,  prepares  to  rise.] 


Sarah. 

[In  shop.]  Elizabeth!  Where  art  thou!  [Enters."\ 
Do  not  disturb  th^-self,  sister!  Tis  no  customer!  'Tis 
only  I ! 

Elizabeth. 

Sister  Sarah !  'Tis  strange  as  pleasant  to  see  you  at  this 
hour  o'  the  morning! 

Sarah. 

The  fair  summer  weather  tempted  me  forth.  Can  I  help 
thee  with  thy  task?  I  have  brought  my  housewife !  [With 
worhhag.] 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  81 


Elizabeth. 


I  thank  you,  sister ;  I  am  setting  the  last  stitch.  Reach  me 
a  bandbox,  will  you?  That  fine,  flowered  one — to  pack 
it  in ! 

Sarah. 

[While  getting  bandhox.]  I  fear  sister,  thee  dost  gain- 
say the  language  of  the  Friends  in  which  thee  was  reared  I 


Elizabeth. 

And  why  should  I  not  gainsay  it,  pray  I  Did  not  the 
Friends  disown  me,  read  me  out  of  meeting!  And  pray 
for  what  offence  ?    For  marrying  the  man  of  my  heart  I 


Saeah. 

Xay !    For  marr\-ing  outside  the  Society,  sister  ! 

Elizabeth. 

Can  hearts  be  confined,  like  prisoners,  within  the  four 
walls  of  the  Meeting-House  ?  Wait  till  your  turn  comes, 
Sarah  Griscom ! 

Saeah. 
Verily,  when  my  turn  comes 


82  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Elizabeth. 

Verily  when  thy  turn  comes — May  you  get  as  good  a  man 
as  my  poor,  dear  John  Eoss  !    [Sheds  tears.] 

Sarah. 
Indeed,  sister,  I  did  not  mean  to  grieve  thee! 

Elizabeth. 

[Wipes  her  eyes.]  My  dear,  there's  more  of  pleasure 
than  pain  in  my  memories !  And,  there !  I  must  not  drop 
my  widow's  tears  upon  my  lady's  ball-gown!  [Holds  up 
dress.] 

Sarah. 
Oh,  sister !    What  finery  the  world's  people  do  wear ! 

Elizabeth. 

A  fine  frock  for  a  fine  lady !     None  other  than  Madam 

Washington ! 

Sarah. 

What,  Martha,  wife  of  George,  commander  of  the 
armies  ? 

Elizabeth. 

The  same ! 

Sarah. 
How  come  they  here  in  Philadelphia  ? 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  83 

Elizabeth. 

I  am  told  that  President  Hancock  summoned  the  Gen- 
eral hither  to  a  conference  with  the  Continental  Congress. 
And  his  lady,  who  is  a  devoted  wife,  accompanied  him. 
One  of  her  lace  flounces  needed  some  repairs,  and  the  hostess 
of  the  City  Tavern,  where  thej^  lie,  recommended  me  to 
her  as  a  skilful  needlewoman !  Xow  if  you  have  done  ad- 
miring it  1^11  e'en  pack  it  up  and  take  it  home ! 


Sarah. 

Let  me  pack  it  while  thee  puts  on  thy  bonnet  I  How  soft 
are  its  folds  !  The  Friends  liold  finery  in  abhorrence,  but — 
She  must  be  a  prett}'  sight  in  this  I  Sister,  how,  dost  thee 
think,  she  came  by  such  a  rent — crookeder  than  our  Phila- 
delphia alleys  I  All  ziofzasr,  like  the  streaks  of  lightning 
Mr.  Franklin  brings  down  from  the  clouds  with  a  key  tied 
to  a  kite's  tail? 

Elizabeth. 

Perhaps  some  awkward  partner  trod  a  heavy  foot  upon 
it  in  a  dance ! 

Sarah. 

[Hands  up  horrified.]  A  dance?  Tie  it  up  thyself  I  The 
Friends  hold  dancing  sinful  I  [Elizabeth  has  put  on  out- 
door clothes  u'liich  she  tool'  from  peg.  She  rou:  ties  strings 
of  handhox.  After  a  slight  pause  Sarah  again  spealcs.] 
Sister,  did  thee  ever  see  a  dance? 


84  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Elizabeth. 

La,  now,  Sally !  Joliii  Eoss  was  as  nimble  a  hand  at  a  jig 
as  one  might  see!  [Sarah  exclaims  shocked,  but  inter- 
ested.] But  Madam  Washington's  style  would  be  a  stately 
minuet.  I  make  no  doubt  I  La,  la !  Fan  in  one  hand,  thus  I 
Skirt  in  'tother !  La,  la  I  Partner  bows — she  curtseys,  thus  I 
La,  la ! 

Sarah. 

[Alternately  stopping  ears  and  hiding  eyes  with  hands.] 
Sister !  0,  fie  I  For  shame !  If  I  stop  my  ears  I  see  thee,  and 
when  I  hide  my  eyes  I  hear  thee !  0,  fie !  And  thee  reared 
a  Friend ! 

Elizabeth. 

[Takes  oandhox.]  I"ll  remove  temptation!  I  won't  be 
long!  "Tend  shop  while  I'm  gone  and  don't  let  a  single 
likely  customer  escape.  [Goes  through  shop.  Sarah,  alone, 
puts  room  to  rights.] 

Sarah. 

La,  la,  la !  Despite  my  will  the  dance  tune  runs  in  my 
head  !  And  despite  my  will  my  feet  keep  time  !  La,  la  !  Fan 
in  one  hand,  thus !  Fie,  for  shame,  Sarah  Griscom !  And, 
yet — ^la.  la !  'Tis  like  a  demon  that  can  only  be  exorcised 
by  giving  it  full  rein!  La,  la!  [Practices  minuet.  Shop- 
hell,  voices  in  shop.] 

Ross. 

[In  shop.]  This  is  the  place!  Mistress  Eoss  I  [Raps  on 
counter.]    What,  ho !  Elizabeth !  Betsey ! 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  8^ 

Morris. 
;>^o  one  within? 

Eoss. 
She  mav  be  in  her  workroom!     [Ushers  AVashixgtox 
and  Morris  into  uorkroom.]  Pray  enter,  your  Excel  ency  . 
Well,  on  my  soul !  [They  stop  short,  seeing  Sarah  who  has 
not  seen  or  heard  thcni.] 

Sakah. 
Skin  in  one  hand,  fan  in  'tother!  La,  la!  Oh!  Gentle- 
men !     [Catching  sight  of  gentlemen^  is  overcome  with  con- 
fusion,  and  runs  off,  ly  door  to  passage.    AU  laugh.] 

Morris. 
A  little  Quakere??.  practicing  a  minuet ! 

Washington. 
And  indifferently  well,  for  a  Quakeress! 

Eoss. 
Ho   Betsey !  A  customer!  Mrs.  Eoss  mnst  have  stepped 
out  on  an  errand!  Pray  be  seated,  gentlemen! 

Washington. 
Yon  feel  assured.  Colonel  Eoss.  that  the  young  woman  is 
competent  to  make  our  flag  ? 


86  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Eoss. 

Oh,  no  doubt  of  it,  your  Excellency !  Since  the  death  of 
my  nephew,  John  Eoss,  she  hath  carried  on  this  upholstery 
business  with  skill  and  credit.  And  as  a  needlewoman  she 
is  notable ! 

AYashixgtox. 

Good !  Then  let  us  profit  by  this  moment  to  agree  upon 
a  suitable  device!  Mr.  Morris,  pray  favor  me  with  your 
counsel ! 

Morris. 

Which  is,  that  the  matter  be  left  entirely  to  General 
Washington,  who,  though  ever  too  modest  to  admit  it,  de- 
signed the  beautiful  standard  now  in  use ! 

Eoss. 
I  second  the  motion  ! 

Washingtox. 

Gentlemen,  ^tis  no  light  task  you  set  me !  The  flag  we 
choose  to-day  will  be,  not  only  an  emblem  for  our  armies, 
but  for  our  nation,  tlirough  the  ages,  in  times  of  peace ! 

Eoss. 

[Wallcing  thoughtfully  to  and  fro.]  The  United  Colonies 
a  separate  nation !  I  suppose  ^tis  bound  to  come ! 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  87 

Morris. 

Oh,  all  signs  point  that  way!  One  by  one  the  several 
colonies  are  following  the  example  of  Virginia  and  passing 
resolutions  favoring  such  separation,  from  the  mother- 
country!  'Tis  an  open  secret  in  Congress  that  ere  long 
]\rr.  Lee  will  offer  a  resolution  of  independence !  Even  now 
President  Hancock  is  picking  a  Committee  to  draw  up  a 
formal  declaration  of  such  independence.  And  Mr.  Jeffer- 
son, on  whom  the  burden  of  the  composition  will  fall,  goes 
about,  puckering  a  thoughtful  brow  over  the  express  terms 
in  which  he  will  set  forth  what  he  so  justly  terms  our  in- 
alienable right,  though  mere  Colonials,  to  life,  liberty,  and 
the  pursuit  of  happiness !    [The  oiJiers  murmur  approval.'] 


Washixgtox. 

Our  new  standard  must  symbolize  our  national  ideal. 
Here  is  the  Grand  L^nion  flag  now  used  for  militar}'  pur- 
poses. [TaJces  flag  from  a  parcel.']  The  stripes,  red,  white, 
thirteen  in  all,  stand  for  the  fraternal  relation  of  our  col- 
onies, while  the  British  ensign  in  the  corner  testified  to  our 
loyalty  for  our  mother-country — a  loyalty  that  is  in  our 
very  blood !  But  now  that  King  George  and  his  ministers 
would  turn  that  lo^^alty  against  us,  as  a  weapon  to  enslave 
us,  there's  but  one  thing,  as  free-born  men,  for  ns  to  do ! 
[Talies  pair  of  scissors  and  cuts  ensign  from  flag.] 

Morris. 

The  act  of  separation  !  A  Declaration  of  Independence ! 
'Tis  well  done ! 


88  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Eoss. 

So  perish  all  enemies  of  liberty !  [Seizes  ensign  and  is 
about  to  destroy  it.    The  others  hastily  restrain  him.'] 

Morris. 

Pardon,  dear  Colonel !  Though  loyal  to  the  Continental 
cause  I  have  a  sentiment — By  birth  I  am  an  Englishman ! 

Washington-. 

So  are  we  all,  of  English  forbears !  Xor  is  our  quarrel 
now  with  England,  but  with  those — alas  !  the  powerful  ones 
— who  misrepresent  her  ! 

Eoss. 

Eight !  My  zeal  for  freedom  carried  me  away !  And  now, 
sir,  what  design  have  you  up  your  sleeve  in  pla^e  of  this  ? 
[Returns  ensign  to  Washington.] 


Morris. 

Did  not  Mr,  Franklin  suggest  a  pattern  of  stars,  bor- 
rowed from  the  Washington  coat-of-arms? 


Eoss. 
Admirable  !  Worthy  of  the  good  doctor ! 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  89 

Washington. 

Ah,  sirs ;  stars  by  all  means  for  our  flag — but  let  us  glean 
our  stars,  not  from  heraldry,  but  Heaven  I  Here  is  a  rough 
sketch  which  in  all  humility  I  offer  for  your  consideration ! 
\_He  fakes  out  a  sketch  and  shows  it  to  the  others.'] 

Morris. 

Excellent !  Faith,  it  could  not  be  bettered ! 

Ross. 

Admirable!  Worthy  of  Washington  I  [He  waves  the 
sketch.']  Our  young  nation's  first  flag;  designed  by  Wash- 
ington! [^At  this  minute  Elizabeth  enters.]  And  here 
comes  Betsey  Ross  to  make  it !  Good-morrow,  Betsey ! 

Elizabeth. 

[Curtseying  lou:.]  Colonel  Ross !  Your  servant !  Your 
servant,  gentlemen ! 

Ross. 

Xow  here's  a  chance  to  turn  an  honest  penn}',  and  a  pa- 
triotic one.  At  my  recommendation  His  Excellency  Gen- 
eral Washington  and  Mr.  Morris  bring  3'ou  a  commission. 

Morris. 

One  that  calls  for  deftness,  despatch,  and  discretion — 
with  which  qualities  Colonel  Ross  assures  us  you  are  well 
endowed I 


90  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Washington-. 

A  commission  that  if  properly  executed  shall  be  as  prop- 
erly compensated! 

Elizabeth. 
Gentlemen,  I  am  deeply  grateful! 

Washington. 

Mistress  Ross,  think  you,  can  you  make  a  flag? 

Elizabeth. 
Your  Excellency — I  can  but  try! 

Washington. 

Here  is  one  that  badly  needs  repairing.     [He  gives  her 
the  flag.] 

Elizabeth. 

Why,  the  Union  Jack  hath  been  cut  completely  out ! 

Washington. 

Aye.    We  purpose  to  substitute  a  canton  of  new  device. 
This! 

Elizabeth. 

[Tal-es  his  sketch.]    White  stars  on  a  blue  field,  cornered 
in  by  stripes  of  white  and  red  !    0  most  felicitous  I    But 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  91 

Washington. 

Well,  mistress.     But ? 

Ross. 

Speak  freely,  Betsey.   His  Excellency  is  the  most  indul- 
gent of  men. 

Washixgtox. 

Aye.     Pray  do  so,  Mrs.  Ross.     Our  flag  will  speak  to 
Heaven  for  women  no  less  than  men  I 

Elizabeth. 

Then,  sir,  who  ever  saw  in  Heaven  a  six-pointed  star? 
God  made  them  with  but  five ! 

Washington. 

True  !  But  cannot  mere  mortals  create  them  more  speed- 
ily with  an  even  number?  Of  course  with  compass,  rule, 
by  geometry 

Elizabeth. 

La,  Your  Excellency !  Geometry  has  naught  to  do  with 
it !  'Tis  just  a  matter  of  folding  your  paper,  once,  twice, 
thrice,  four,  five  times.     Then  a  snip  o'  the  scissors— and 

vour  star ! 

[Has  iUustraied.  while  spealing.     The  gentlemen  ex- 
claim, admiring.^ 


92  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Eoss. 

I  own  to  some  skill  in  mustering  troops,  but 

Morris. 

And  I  in  drawing  up  a  balance-sheet,  but 


Washixgtox. 

I  can  divide  an  army  into  five  T\ith  a  stroke  of  the  pen, 

but Mistress  Ross,  teach  us  the  secret  of  a  five-pointed 

star! 

[Ross  and  Morris  murmur  asserit.'] 

Elizabeth. 

Then,  gentlemen,  pray  take  paper — these  sheets  on  which 
I  draw  my  patterns  will  serve — its  length  to  its  breadth 
being  as  four  to  three!  [lUusirafes,  the  others  following.'] 
Call  3'our  upper  margin  a,  the  lower  b !  Now  bring  a  and  b 
together  and  fold  I 

Washixgtox. 
A  reinforces  b. 

Elizabeth. 

Our  new  corners  we'll  call  d.  e,  f  and  g. 

Ross. 

Betsey,  if  I  recall  mV  alphabet  you've  skipped  c ! 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  93 

Elizabeth. 

Rather  saving  it  for  future  use,  Colonel.  Xow  all  please 
to  find  the  point  on  the  margin  midway  twixt  e  and  g. 
Xame  it  p. 

Morris. 

And  pray  why  p? 

Elizabeth. 

That's  just  the  point  of  the  whole  matter,  sir  I  [They 
laugh.]     Xow  swing  d  to  p  and  fold ! 


Washixgtox. 
By  a  flank  movement  d  reinforces  p. 

Elizabeth. 
The  new  corner  will  be 

Eoss. 
C  :    I  see  :    The  centre  ! 

Elizabeth. 

"Ri.ffht.  Cohmel  I     Xow  swing  d  over  the  fold  c  p  and 
crease  it  flat ' 

Gextlemex. 
[Oheijing.~\   'Tis  done  I 


94  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


Elizabeth. 


Xow  swing  p  over,  back  or  front — 'tis  the  same — till 
the  two  folded  sides  lie  evenlv  as  one,  startins  from  c. 


Gentlemen. 
'Tis  done ! 

Elizabeth. 

Now  one  more  sharp  twist,  turning  a  square  corner,  so 
as  to  make  a  Continental  cocked  hat,  whose  base  shall  be 
c  p.  [The  gentlemen  follow  instructions  always.l  Xow 
please  take  scissors,  and  cut  out  your  hat.  Unfolded,  you'll 
see,  it  is  a  star! 

Ross. 

[Holding  up  his  star.]  A  new  constellation!  A  lucky 
star ! 

Morris. 

{Doing  the  same.]     Pointers  for  posterity! 

Washington. 

[Doing  the  same.]  The  fingers  of  an  infant  nation's 
hand! 

Elizabeth. 

I  have  materials,  blue,  white,  upstairs.  If  you'll  be 
pleased  to  wait,  with  my  sister's  aid  I  can  run  up  a  sample 
in  no  time^ 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  95 


Washington. 


Do  so.  And  accept  our  thanks,  Mrs.  Ross,  for  your  les- 
son in  astronomy ! 

[Ross  ouid  Morris  assent.'] 

Elizabeth. 

Astronomy !  La,  gentlemen  I  Just  a  fold  or  so  of  the 
paper,  and  a  snip  of  the  scissors  I  That's  all  I  \_Goes  hy 
door  to  passage.] 

[A  disturhance  is  heard  in  the  street.] 

Eoss. 
What's  amiss! 

Morris. 

Oh,  doubtless  one  of  the  Whig  and  Tory  street  brawls 
that  are  so  frequent  with  us !  Let  us  go  see !  [He  and 
Eoss  go  out.] 

Washington. 

[Making  a  new  star.]  I  have  a  mind  to  surprise  my 
dear  lady  with  my  new  accomplishment  I  Bring  a  and  b 
together [George  is  heard,  crying  out  for  help.  Wash- 
ington starts  up.]     What !     A  child  in  distress  ! 

[George  runs  in.  Over  Ms  own  good  clothes  he  has 
drawn  the  old  red-coat  of  a  British  soldier^  much 
too  large  for  him.  Also  he  wears  a  battered,  Brit- 
ish soldiers  hat.] 


96  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

George. 
Help,  help!     Oh,  save  me!     Save  me! 

Washington. 

Dear  me!  The  enemy!  And  in  sorry  plight!  Come, 
come,  little  man,  what  ails  thee  ?  Didst  fall  in  the  mud  ? 
[Brushing  George.] 

George. 

'Twas  those  shameless  Whig  children  called  me  names 
and  pelted  me ! 

Washington. 

And  wherefore,  pray? 

George. 
^Cause  I'm  a  Tory,  I  am ! 

Washington. 

But,  Whig  or  Tory,  you  must  be  brave,  not  run  away! 

George. 

Oh,  I  mind  not  the  Whig  children !  I  can  throw  mud  as 
well  as  they !     [Pauses  for  breath.] 

Washington. 
Hm!    A  politician  in  the  making! 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  97 


George. 


But  they  say  he's  coming  after  me  !    He  passed  this  way ! 
Acd  lie'll'eat^ne  up  alive,  'cause  of  my  uniform! 

Washington. 

No  ?     And  who  is  this  bloodthirsty  monster  ? 

George. 
Why,  who  but  George  Washington ! 

Washington. 
Eh?     George  Washington? 

George. 
Aye  I     Oh,  sir :     Save  me  !    Don't  let  him  get  me ! 

Washington. 

I  promise  vou  no  harm  shall  come  to  you  from  Wash- 
ington while  you  bide  with  me !  I'll  e'en  escort  you  home. 
But,  first—  P  will  be  the  point [Busy  ivitli  sfar.] 

George. 
What  do  you?    [Interested.'] 


mmm 


98  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Washington. 
I  prepare  a  message  for —  Oh,  a  great  many  liundredg 
of  little  boys  and  girls ! 

George. 
A  great  many  hundreds —  All  your  little  boys  and  girls  ? 

Washington. 

Well,  truly,  I  should  be  honored  if  ever  they  thought  of 
me  as  a  father ! 

George. 
And  what  is  your  message? 

Washington. 
Wait,  and  you'll  learn  it !—  Xow,  fold 


George. 
What  is  thy  name  ? 

Washington. 
Suppose  we  'change  information,  like  prisoners  of  war  I 

George. 
Agreed  !     I'm  George  ! 

Washington. 
And  so,  too,  am  I — George  I 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  99 

George. 

How  odd!  That's  why  I'm  so  dravrn  to  thee  I  I  was 
named  after  His  Gracious  Majesty ! 

Washixgtox. 
I  too  was  named  after  a  King  George ! 

George. 

Then  you're  a  Tory  too  ! —  Halloo !  I  never  noted  it  till 
now  !  Oh,  a  Whig  !  A  soldier,  too  !  Oh,  a  rebel !  Turn- 
coat !    Rene — rene 

Washington. 

Renegade  ? 

George. 

Aye,  that's  the  name  I  Oh,  I'll  none  of  you  I  I'll  sooner 
take  my  chances  with  George  Washington !    [About  to  go.~\ 

Washington. 

Wait !  Perchance  I  may  justify  myself !  George,  do  you 
say  your  prayers? 

George. 
Surely!    Xight  and  morning!    Do  not  you? 

Washington. 

Aye,  that  indeed  I  do.  As  doth  Washington,  night, 
morning  and  between! 


100  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

George. 

Between?    Oh,  but  that  is  more  than  called  for! 


Washington. 

Pathless  I  find  it  helps  me,  as  does  Washington  I  Well, 
one  day  in  my  prayers  God  seemed  to  tell  me  that  King 
George  was  too  far  distant  to  understand  the  needs  of  the 
colonies !  ^Tis  as  if  your  parents  were  a  thousand  leagues 
away  from  you,  with  an  ocean  parting  you,  and  did  not 
realize  that  you  were  growing  a  lusty,  strong-limbed  lad — 
no  longer  able  to  wear  swaddling  clothes ! 


George. 

But  King  George  is  not  so  far —  Oh,  not  near  so  far  away 
as  God ! 

Washington. 

Hm  !  It  seemed  otherwise  to  me,  as  to  Washington  !  So 
we  fight,  not  to  harm  little  Tory  boys,  but  that  they  may 
grow  up  in  peace.  Xow  will  you  e'en  think  more  kindly 
of  us? 

George. 

Aye,  that  will  I.    And  I  thank  you,  sir,  for  your  courtesy 
and  pro-pro-protection.     And  if  the  Tory  children  revile 
you  and  pelt  you  they  will  have  to  answer  for  it  to  me  I 
[Salutes,  about  to  go.     Washington  salutes  in  re- 
turn.~\ 


THE  FIRST'FLAG  101 


Washixgtox. 


Sir,  I  reciprocate  with  thanks  for  your  courtesy   and 
promised  protection. 

[He  sits  again,  and  coniinues  his  star-mahing.  At 
the  moment  Martha  Washixgtox  enters.  George, 
ahout  to  go,  stands  aside  to  allow  her  to  yass.'] 


Martha. 

Mistress  Eoss— where  is  Mistress  Eoss?  Well,  upon  my 
word,  George!  [Washixgtox,  surprised,  drops  the  scis- 
sors.] 

Washixgtox. 

Martha ! 

[At  this  minute  Eoss  and  Morris  return.     Seeing 
Martha  they  how  low,  while  she  curtseys  in  return.] 

Eoss. 

Mrs.  Washington,  we  saw  your  coach  stop  here  and  hast- 
ened to  hand  you  out,  but  you  were  too  quick  for  us ! 

Morris. 

Has  the  General  let  you  into  this  famous  secret  of  his  ? 

Martha. 

The  General  never  lets  me  into  his  secrets  !  George,  what 
so  engrosses  you? 


102  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Washixgtox. 

What  need  to  let  my  dearest  Patsy  into  my  secrets  when 
she  always  surprises  them! 

Martha. 

I  protest,  sir,  I  knew  not  of  3'our  presence  here !  The 
young  woman  who  keeps  this  shop  hath  darned  some  lace 
of  mine  so  dexterously,  I  came  to  give  her  an  order  for 
some  sets  of  ruffles,  a  surprise  for  a  certain  gentleman 
whose  linen  suffers  from  his  devotion  to  his  country's  cause, 
in  the  chance  laundry  work  of  campaigning!  George, 
what  do  you  try  to  do  ? 

Washington. 

I  seek  to  make  history,  my  love,  in  the  form  of  a  five- 
pointed  star! 

Martha. 

La,  la !  Let  me  show  yoa  the  way!  Five  twists  of  the 
paper,  a  cut,  and  'tis  done !  [Illustrating.  The  gentlemen 
applaud.] 

Ross. 

When  men  would  seek  the  stars  let  them  take  their  wives 
for  guides ! 

George. 

[Who  has  been  standing  amazed,  now  runs  to  Washing- 
ton.]    Are  you  indeed  he — George  Washington? 


THE  FIRST  FLAG 


103 


A^/  iLiJ^^ , 


THE  FIRST  FLAG  105 

Washixgtox. 
At  your  service,  sir! 

Geoege. 

Then  on  my  soul  I'm  sorry  I  reviled  thee.     I  apo-apo- 
apolo 

Washixgtox. 
Apologize  ?     There  is  no  need  I     We  both  are  patriots ! 

George. 

Aye,  and  gentlemen ! 

Washixgtox. 

The  two  go  together  !    Wait !    I'd  have  thee  see  my  mes- 
sage I 

[Elizabeth  and  Sarah  enter  with  the  completed  flag. 
They  stand  holding  it  np  for  inspection.] 

Ross. 

Hurrah !     The  first  flag  of  the  United  Colonies — United 

States ! 

Morris. 
The  flag  of  the  free.     Long  may  it  wave ! 

Martha. 

'Tis  beautiful.     Some  day  some  one  will  write  a  song 
about  it — The  Star-Spangled  Banner ! 


106  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Washington. 

[Taking  George's  hand.]  Look  well  on  it,  little  one,  thy 
country's  flag.  Let  its  message  be  to  boys  and  girls  to  honor 
their  country,  to  fight  for  it  if  need  be,  bravely.  But  above 
all  to  put  their  trust  in  God,  to  love  their  fellow-men.  and 
to  strive  for  the  world's  peace ! 

All. 

Aye,  for  the  world's  peace ! 


ABE  LINCOLN  AND  LITTLE  A.  D. 


Lincoln's  Birtliday 


To  Richard  ^,L  R. 

AXD  ALL  LADS  WHO  STRIVE  TOR  PEACE 


ABE  LINCOLN  AND  LITTLE  A.  D. 

The  scene  is  laid  in  a  lihrary.  Two  doors,  one  called  the 
first  door,  the  other  the  second  door.  A  window.  A 
table  and  some  chairs.  BooTcs  on  shelves  and  table, 
also  a  worn  one  on  the  floor  in  a  corner. 

Characters 

A.  D.,  a  small  boy. 

LixcoLX,  the  child. 

Lincoln^  the  youth. 

Lincoln,  the  man. 

[Different  individuals  are  needed  to  personate  Lincoln  in 
these  several  phases.  There  must  be  no  delay  what- 
ever in  entrances.'] 

Time 
The  present. 

A.  D. 

[With  school  booTcs,  enters,  first  door,  muttering  to  him- 
self.'] Bother!  A  composition  on  Abraham  Lincoln  to 
write !  [Throws  booTcs  on  table.]  What  do  I  know  about 
Abraham  Lincoln!  [Gets  out  paper  and  pencil.]  How 
shall  I  begin !  Wait,  all  compositions  about  great  men  begin 
by  saying  when  they  were  born  and  when  they  die !  That's 
easy.  I  can  get  that  from  the  history !  [Consults  booh  and 
writes.]  Abraham  Lincoln,  sixteenth  president  of  the 
United  States,  was  born  in  Hardin  County,  Kentucky,  Feb- 


no  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

ruary  12,  1819,  and  died  in  Washington,  D.  C,  April  15, 
1865!  If  I  only  knew  what  to  fill  in  with!  [Yawns.] 
What  do  I  know  about  Abraham  Lincoln !  What  do  I  care 
to  know  about  him.  He's  dead!  [Falls  asleep  head  on 
tahle.'] 

[Abe  enters,  first  door.  He  is  a  small  hoy,  roughly 
clad.  He  carries  a  wooden  shovel  and  a  bundle  of 
houghs.  Setting  these  down  he  shades  his  eyes  and 
gazes  as  if  into  the  distance,  while  speaking  to  him- 
self.] 

Abe. 

Hm  !  Quite  a  spell  before  you  set !  [As  if  addressing  the 
sun.]  If  you're  smart,  Abe,  my  son,  I  reckon  you'll  have  time 
to  finish  that  Life  of  Washington  before  sundown!  [Goes 
to  a  hlanJc  space  in  the  wall,  and  feels  for  something,  evi- 
dently not  finding  it.]  My  book!  Where's  my  book!  I 
certainly  left  it  wedged  in  that  crack !  Has  one  of  those 
plaguey  boys  taken  it  ?  If  so,  I'll  fix  him  !  [Looking  ahout, 
catches  sight  of  A.  D.  and  pounces  on  him.]  Here,  you ! 
Wake  up !    Did  you  take  my  book  ? 


A.  D. 

[Sleepily.]  Your  book !    Who  are  you  and  what  do  you 
want? 

Abe. 

[Shaking  him.]     Gome,  no  fooling!     Did  you  take  my 
book? 


ABE  LIN'COLX  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.  Ill 

A.  D. 

Of  course  I  didn't  take  your  book !  I  have  all  the  books 
I  want  of  my  own  I  I  wish  you  wouldn't  disturb  me.  I'm 
very  busy  I 

Abe. 

Well,  you'll  be  busier  soon,  I  reckon,  if  you  don't  answer 
me !    Did  you  take  the  Life  of  Washington ': 


A.  D. 

Of  course  not  I    Why  in  the  world  should  I  take  the  life 
of  Washington  ?    He's  dead  ! 


Abe. 

[Sfrucl'  hy  tJie  humor  of  this.]     Ha,  ha,  ha  I  Boy,  you're 
dreaming  I 


A.  D. 

Dreaming  yourself!     [Suddenly  stares  at  Abe.]     Who 
are  you  and  what  are  you  doing  here  ? 


Abe. 

Well,  now,  stranger,  that's  the  identical  question  I  was 
going  to  put  to  you !  I  presume  your  folks  are  the  new 
settlers  up  the  Creek  I 


maam 


112  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

A.  D. 

[Rubbing  eyes.']    New  settlers !    This  is  my  home  ! 


Abe. 

Well,  we  won't  quarrel  about  that.     Outdoors  is  every- 
body's home,  I  reckon ! 

A.  D. 

[Rubs  eyes'] .    Oh.    Is  this  outdoors  ?    I  sa}^,  who  are  you 
and  where  do  you  come  from  ? 


Abe. 

Wh}^  everybody  round  here  knows  me !     I'm  Tom  Lin- 
coln's boy  Abe ! 

A.  D. 

Wherever  have  I  heard  that  name !     [Puzzled.] 

Abe. 

And,  like  most  folks  I  come  from  the  place  where  I  was 
born,  Hardin  County,  Kentucky ! 

A.  D. 

Hardin  County,  Kentucky!     Surely  you  weren't  born 
on 

Abe. 


On  February  12,  1809  ! 


ABE  LINXOLX  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.  113 

A.  D. 

1809  !  Oh,  nonsense  I  Why,  that  would  make  you — let 
me  see,  how  old  !  Why,  this  is  A.  D. — A.  D. — [trying  to 
remember.] 

Abe. 

[Laughs.]  Well,  you  are  a  sleepy  head,  A.  D. !  I  reckon 
I  must  git  along  now  to  do  my  chores!  [Moves  to  go,  by 
second  door.] 

A.  D. 

[Detains  him.]  But  you  haven't  yet  told  me  how  you 
got  here ! 

Abe. 

You  mean  from  Kentucky  to  Illinois  ? 


A.  D. 
[To  himself.']  Dear  me  !    Is  this  out-of-doors  in  Illinois? 

Abe. 

Since  we  aren't  birds  to  fly,  or  moles  to  dig  under  the 
earth,  we  came  the  usual  way — on  horseback ! 


A.  D. 

Oh,  is  that  the  usual  way  to  get  from  Kentucky  to  Il- 
linois, if  you  are  born  in  1809? 


114  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


Abe. 


Sure !  Oh,  and  wasn't  it  fine,  riding  by  day,  and  sleeping 
by  night  on  the  ground !  We  bad  to  take  turns  walking, 
for  we  had  only  three  horses  for  the  four  of  us :  father, 
mother,  sister  and  me !  But  we  made  good  time,  for  we 
traveled  light.  Y^ou  see  all  our  household  stuff  had  gone 
to  the  bottom  of  the  Ohio  on  a  leaky  raft !  We  covered  the 
hundred  miles  in  seven  days ! 

A.  D. 

Y^ou  call  that  quick  ?    Why  didn't  you  take  the  train? 

Abe. 

The  train?    What's  that? 

A.  D. 

Why,  you  are  a  greenhorn  I  Cars  hitched  to  a  locomotive ! 
Choo,  choo !  Puff,  puff !    Then— whiz !  Off  she  goes  ! 

Abe. 

Oh,  father  has  told  me  about  the  engine  Stevenson  has 
invented  I  A.  D.,  [i?npressed]  have  you  ever  travelled  that 
way? 

A.  D. 

Oh,  scores  of  times !  But  T  prefer  a  motor !  A  little  choo, 
choo,  chug,  chug  of  your  own,  you  know ! 


ABE  LIN'COLX  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.  115 

Abe. 

Oh,  but  don't  you  run  over  things  ? 

A.  D. 

Xot  if  we  can  help  it  I  We  blow  a  horn  to  tell  people  to 
look  out  for  themselves  !    Honk !  Honk  I 

Abe. 
To  think  of  that  I 

A.  D. 

Of  course  you  don't  know  about  airships?  and  flying 
men? 

Abe. 

See  here,  A.  D.,  if  you  get  too  far  beyond  me  my  head 
won't  stand  it !  I  expect  to  fly,  myself,  some  day,  if  I'm 
good  enough ! 

A.  D. 

[Laughs.]     What  an  odd  boy  you  are  I 

Abe. 

Odd  !  Look  at  yourself !  Talk  of  odd ! 

A.  D. 

Me  odd !  My  mother  always  buys  my  clothes  in  the  very 
latest  fashion^  I'd  have  you  know  I 


116  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Abe. 

What,  before  the  others  are  worn  out?  What  an  awful 
waste  of  money;  money  that  you  might  spend  on  books! 
Bound  here  we  have  only  one  fashion :  what  we  can  get ! 

A.  D. 

Well,  at  my  school  they'd  laugh  at  you ! 

Abe. 

They'd  soon  laugh  on  the  other  side  of  the  way,  then! 
Laugh  at  the  best  my  parents  can  provide  for  me !  This 
linsey-woolsey  shirt  that  mother  spun  and  wove  herself, 
every  thread !  These  buckskin  breeches  father  made !  This 
cap  I  caught  myself  ! 

A.  D. 

What  do  you  mean,  you  caught  your  cap  yourself  ? 


Abe. 

When  it  was  running  round  on  four  legs  and  calling  it- 
self a  coon! 

A.  D. 

Oh,  I  see ! 


ABE  LINCOLN  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.         117 

Abe. 

I  reckon  I've  about  come  to  the  end  of  my  wardrobe! 
Oh,  no.  My  gloves  !  I  only  use  them  in  cold  weather  !  We 
grow  them  ourselves  and  I  have  a  fresh  pair  every  day! 
See!  [TaJces  a  roast  potato  from  either  pocket,']  When 
they're  too  cold  for  gloves  we  call  them  dinner !  Father  al- 
ways asks  a  blessing  over  them,  and  when  I  tell  them  they're 
mighty  poor  blessings  mother  reminds  me  there's  folks  that 
haven't  half  so  much  to  be  thankful  for !  There  never  was 
such  a  hand  for  making  the  best  of  things  as  mother! 
Laugh,  indeed ! 

A.  D. 

I  beg  your  pardon,  Abe !  The  fellows  wouldn't  think  of 
such  a  thing  and  if  they  did  I'd  thrash  them  myself,  I 
would ! 

Abe. 

No  offence,  A.  D.  But  I  must  find  my  book !  I  left  it 
in  this  crack  ?    Eight  here,  in  the  wall  of  our  log-cabin  ? 


A.  D. 

[Biibs  eyes.]    Oh,  is  that  your  log-cabin? 

Abe. 

I  reckon  you'd  know  it,  if  you  had  helped  split  the  logs 
for  it,  as  I  did  I 


118  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


A.  D. 


Why,  I  begin  to  see  !  And  what  a  funny  window !  [Looh 
ing  at  a  hlanh  wall]     Why  didn't  you  use  glass? 

Abe. 

Didn't  have  any,  so  father  stretched  pigskin  across  the 
opening.  There  never  was  such  a  hand  for  making  the 
best  of  things  as  father,  except  mother! 

A.  D. 

[Peeping  in  at  an  imaginary  window  in  the  wall.l  Only 
one  room! 

Abe. 

Xo,  sir !  My  own  sleeping  chamber  is  up  those  stairs ! 
Don't  you  see  those  pegs  in  the  wall? 

A.  D. 

Oh,  3'es !    What  fun  it  must  be  to  climb  them ! 

Abe. 
And  I  have  the  finest  bed  of  dry  leaves ! 

A.  D. 

Dry  leaves ! 

Abe. 

Sun's  setting.  I  really  must  go !  [Picks  up  spade  and 
houghs.'] 


ABE  LINCOLN  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.         119 
A.  D. 


What  are  those  for? 


Abe. 


That's  my  candle  and  my  slate.  I  kindle  these  boughs, 
and  then  I  do  my  sums  on  this  spade,  and  when  it's  full  I 
scrape  them  off! 

A.  D. 

What  fun ! 

Abe. 

You  see,  I  can  only  go  to  school  by  littles,  the  days  there 
are  no  chores  to  do,  so  I  make  the  most  of  any  minute  I 
can  get!  Why,  there's  my  book!  [Drops  spade,  etc.,  and 
stooping,  picks  up  a  booh  from  the  floor  by  the  wall.']  The 
wind  must  have  blown  it  down  in  the  storm  and  now  the 
rain  has  spoiled  the  covers !    Oh,  dear  I    Oh,  dear ! 


A.  D. 

But  if  it's  only  the  covers,  you  still  can  read  it ! 

Abe. 

But  it  doesn't  belong  to  me.     It  was  lent  to  me  by  a 

neighbor,  Mr.  Joslin! [Suddenly  listens,  and  loohs  in 

direction  of  first  door.]  There  he  goes  now,  riding  by! 
ril  go  tell  him!  0  Mr.  Joslin!  Mr.  Joslin!  [Runs  out 
by  second  door.] 


120  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


A.  D. 


Oh,  Mr. ' Joslin !  Mr.  Joslin !  Please  don't  scold  him ! 
He  didn't  mean  to  spoil  your  book !  I'm  sure  he  didn't ! 
And  he's  so  poor,  and  so  plucky !    Well,  Abe  ? 


Abe. 

[Runs  lach,  breathlessly,  pleased.]  Oh,  thank  you; 
thank  you  kindly,  Mr.  Joslin !  I'll  not  forget  your  kind- 
ness, sir !  Oh,  A.  D.,  isn't  he  good !  He's  going  to  let  me 
pull  fodder  for  him  for  two  days,  in  payment — and  I'm  to 
keep  the  book!  Hurrah!  The  first  book  I  have  had  of 
my  very  own — and  such  a  book  !  The  Life  of  Washington  ! 
[Prepares  to  go,  second  door.] 

A.  D. 

Oh,  I'm  as  glad,  as  glad !  Abe,  before  you  go,  do  me  a 
favor.  [Rubs  eyes.]  You  see  I  don't  quite  under- 
stand  1 

Abe. 

[Rubs  eyes.]  I  know  what  you  mean,  A.  D. !  Let's 
both  do  it  to  each  other !  [Each  prepares  to  pinch  the 
other.] 

A.  D. 

All  right !  At  the  same  time  !  Together !  One ;  two ; 
three!  [At  three  they  pinch  each  other;  each  cries  out 
lustily.] 


ABE  LINCOLN  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.  121 

Abe. 
At  any  rate  the  pinch  was  no  dream!     [Ruhs  arm.'] 

A.  D. 

[Euhhing  arm.]  Xo,  indeed,  it  was  not !  Good-bye,  Abe ! 
Come  soon  again  !  And  now  1  must  get  to  work — \_Yawns.~\ 
and  write  a  composition  about  the  Sixteenth  President  of 
the  United  States,  Abraham  Lincoln! 

Abe. 

[Pauses  in  the  act  of  going,  stares  at  A.  D.]     Abraham 

Lincoln !    Why,  A.  D.,  that's  my  name ! [He  goes  out 

by  second  door,  with  houghs  and  spade,  speaking  dreamily 
to  himself.]    x^braham  Lincoln,  Sixteenth  President  of  the 

United  States 

A.  D. 

[Has  resumed  seat  at  table,  and  speaking  to  himself, 
starts  to  write.]  His  people  were  very  poor,  but  he  was  the 
pluckiest  little  chap,  always  trying  to  learn — and  so  hon- 
est— so  honest 

[Falls  asleep.  Abe,  the  youth,  enters,  first  door, 
whistling.  He  sits,  feet  up  on  a  table,  and  taking 
book  from  pocket,  begins  to  study.] 

Abe. 

A  noun  is  the  name  of  any  person,  place  or  thing— of 
any  person,  place  or  thing!  1  declare,  my  mind  is  like 
a  piece  of  steel— it's  so  hard  to  scratch  things  on  it !  There's 
one  comfort,  however,  it's  as  hard  to  rub  them  off ! 


122  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

A.  D. 

[Half  walcing.]  Always  trying  to  improve  himself — 
What  shall  I  put  next !  [Rises,  stretches  himself,  hut  stops 
short  and  stares  at  Abe.] 

Abe. 

Well,  my  lad,  what  can  I  do  for  you  ?  Come,  wake  up ! 
What  did  mother  send  you  for :  molasses,  gingham,  butter, 
cheese,  or  a  nice  new  broom !  Forgotten,  eh  ?  Well,  just 
look  around  the  store  till  you  remember  what  you  want ! — 
Adjectives  qualify  nouns 

A.  D. 

Who  are  you  and  where  am  I  ? 


Abe. 

You  are  in  the  principal  and  only  store  of  the  pleasant 
but  not  flourishing  village  of  Xew  Salem,  Illinois,  and  you 
are  conversing  with  its  head  and  only  clerk,  Abe  Lincoln, 
at  your  service ! 

A.  D. 

Why,  it's  Abe ! 

Abe. 

Why [Jumps  up.']     It's  my  dream  boy,  little  A.  D. ! 

I  must  have  fallen  asleep  over  this  grammar!     Howdy, 
A.  D.,  howdy !     [They  shake  hands  cordially.] 


ABE  LIN-COLN  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.         123 

A.  D. 

But  how  you  have  grown  I 


Abe. 
Prettier,   or   lengthwise?     They  call   tne   Longshanks, 
hereaboiits.    And  Aihat  have  you  been  doing  with  yourself . 

A.  D. 

[Yawning.]  Oh,   just   trying   to   write   a    composition 
about— but  you  tell  me  about  yourself ! 

Abe. 

The  short  and  simple  annals  of  the  poor !    I've  done  some 
surve^dng,  like  Washington,  only  with  just  one  of  natures 
grape"  chains  off  the  vine !    And  now  I  am  study-ing  gram- 
marandlaw.    Yes,  sir ;  I  mean  to  be  a  lawy-er !    Oh  there 
one  thing  to  tell  you  about;  I  helped  take  a  boatload  of 
cargo  dow-n  to  New  Orleans,  and  while  there  I  saw  sights 
that  would  make  your  heart  bleed-slaves,  chained,  whipped, 
sold  at  auction  in  the  market  place!     Of  course  folks  say 
if  vou  don't  like  it,  go  back  to  a   State  where  slavery 
doesn't  exist!     But  that's  the  awful  part,  A.  D.-that  it 
can  exist  in  any  State.    Here's  a  line.    If  you  re  born  on 
one  side  of  it  you  are  a  human  being-a  man  or  woman. 
But  born  on  the  other  side,  if  you  chance  to  have  a  colored 
skin  you're  just  a  chattel,  a  thing-that  may  be  bought 
and  sold,  like  this  chair ! 


124  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

A.  D. 

How  terrible ! 

Abe. 

Terrible !  Boy,  it's  a  national  crime !  By  Heavens,  if 
ever  I  get  a  chance  to  hit  at  it,  I'll  hit  hard !  But,  there ! 
I  reckon  I'm  making  a  speech !  It's  a  way  I  have  when 
any  one  is  patient  enough  to  listen  to  me ! 

A.  D. 

Go  on  !    I  like  it ! 

Abe. 

Well,  sir;  in  law,  if  a  piece  of  property  is  stolen  from 
you,  you  don't  lose  your  right  to  it!  Why  then  should 
you  lose  your  right  to  yourself,  if  you  are  stolen,  eh? 

A.  D. 

Splendid !    Hear,  hear  !     [Applauding.'] 

Abe. 

Well,  then,  gentlemen,  I  say,  the  dragon's  teeth  were 
sown  first  when  the  first  cargo  of  slaves  was  brought  to 
Jamestown  in  1620.  However — Here!  You  quit  that! 
[Looking  toward  second  door,  he  evidently  sees  something 
that  angers  him  and  is  ahout  to  rush  off  threateningly.'] 
It's  a  two-legged  brute  kicking  a  helpless,  dumb  horse !  I 
reckon  he  needs  a  kicking  himself.  [Runs  out,  second 
door.] 


ABE  LINCOLN  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.  125 

A.  D. 
Bravo,  Abe!     That's  splendid!     Hit  him!     Hit  him 
again !    :Make  him  bite  the  dust.    Bravo ! 

Abe. 
[Returning.]     I  reckon  he  won't  do  it  again  in  a  long 
while ! 

A.  D. 
Xow  go  on  about  the  slaves ! 

Abe. 

Sirs,  as  Washington  observed,  we  proclaim  all  men  free 
and  equal,  but—  There,  A.  D.,  I  guess  you've  had  enough 
of  me  for  the  present.  And  I  must  go  now  and  return  six 
cents  to  a  woman  who  overpaid  me  by  mistake  to-day.  I 
won't  be  long.  It's  only  two  miles  away !  Good-bye  for 
the  present,  A.  D. 

A.  D. 
Oh,  Abe !    Do  you  think  you  ever  will  be  President  of 
the  United  States? 

Abe. 
Me!  President!  [LaugJis.]  I  can  answer  that  better 
at  the  end  of  the  chapter,  A.  D. !  It's  not  wise  to  swap 
horses  while  you  are  crossing  the  stream,  you  know !  But 
if  ever  I  am  there's  one  thing  I'll  hit,  and  hit  so  that  it 
bites  the  dust,  and  that  is  slavery!  You  just  watch !  Good- 
bye!   [Goes  out,  second  door.'] 


126  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


A.  D. 


[Sits,  writes,  growing  all  the  time  sleepier.']  Surve}dng 
— grammar — law,  while  a  grocer's  clerk — plucky,  honest, 
always  trying  to  improve  himself — full  of  compassion  for 
suffering,  whether  of  man  or  beast — A  visit  to  Xew  Orleans 
in  charge  of  a  boat  fired  his  blood  with  the  horrors  of 
slavery,   and  he  then   and   there   resolved — resolved — re- 

solv 

[Falls  fast  asleep.     Lixcoln,  the  man,  enters,  first 
door,  paces  up  and  down,  lost  in  thought.'] 

Lincoln. 

[To  himself.]  The  day  for  compromise  has  passed. 
This  slavery  question  can  no  longer  be  postponed.  It  is 
either  the  Union  or  secession ! 

A.  D. 

[^Vakes  up  slowly.]  After  serving  in  the  Legislature  of 
Illinois,  he  was  elected —  AYhy — Abe !  You  are  Abraham 
Lincoln — Sixteenth  President  of  the  L'nited  States ! 

LiXCOLX. 

And  3'Ou  are  my  little  friend,  A.  D. !  Howdy  I  [They 
shake  hands.] 

A.  D. 

Oh,  Mr.  Lincoln,  Mr.  Lincoln,  are  the  slaves  goinf  to 
I)e  set  free? 


ABE  LINCOLN  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.         127 

Lincoln. 

Please  God,  A.  D. !  This  country  cannot  endure,  a  house 
divided  against  itself,  half  slave,  and  half  free!  It  has 
been  said  that  might  makes  right,  but  now  it  is  time  for 
us  to  reverse  the  maxim  and  teach  that  right  makes  might ! 

A.  D. 

Oh,  Mr.  Lincoln !    Are  you  going  to  war  ? 

Lincoln. 

Not  if  we  can  help  it,  boy !  Not  if  the  slave  States  will 
consent  to  abolition  by  purchase — by  compensating  them 
for  their  human  property !  Not  if  we  can  persuade  them 
to  keep  the  peace  and  bring  about  a  happy  revolution 
through  the  ballot-box !  But  it's  hard  work,  drawing  such 
a  sled  uphill ! 

A.  D. 

But,  Mr.  Lincoln — there  is  a  war !    See !   [With  hiMort/.] 

Lincoln. 

Yes,  we  can't  escape  history !  There  is  a  war — but  not 
for  abolition,  but  to  restore  union ! 

A.  D. 

[Excited.]  Cumberland  Gap,  Memphis,  Chattanooga — 
I  can  hear  the  guns  I  How  many  men  are  against  us  in 
the  field? 


128  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Lincoln. 

That's  always  a  little  hard  to  tell.  When  our  generals 
get  whipped  they  always  say  the  enemy  outnumbered  them 
by  five  to  one !     IBoth  laugh,  slightly.] 

A.  D. 

What  splendid  work  Grant  is  doing! 

Lincoln. 

Grant  is  a  great  man !  The  others  write  and  ask  me  for 
directions,  but  when  Grant  found  himself  with  a  lot  of 
cavalry  on  his  hands  and  no  horses  he  simply  wired  to  ask 
me  whether  to  dismiss  them  or  turn  them  into  infantry  I 
[Both  smile.~\  Brave,  splendid  fellows  on  both  sides !  The 
pity  of  it — the  pity  of  it!  As  Washington  said.  War  is 
but  a  sword  sheathed  in  a  brother's  breast! —  [Suddenly 
he  takes  up  an  imaginary  pen  and  writes.']  The  Proclama- 
tion of  Emancipation — let's  see,  this  is  the  first  day  of  the 
New  Y^ear,  1863 — I  have  been  shaking  hands  for  an  hour, 
and  my  arm  is  nearly  paralyzed,  but  if  my  fingers  tremble, 
posterity  will  think  I  hesitated!  And  the  lives  and  lib- 
erties of  over  thirty  million  people  are  involved;  our  na- 
tional honor  is  at  stake  for  all  time  to  come!  [Writes  on 
imaginary  paper.']  There,  that  will  do !  If  ever  my  name 
goes  into  history  it  will  be  for  this  act!  My  whole  soul 
is  in  it ! 


ABE  LINCOLN  AND  LITTLE  A.  D.  129 

A.  D. 

Oh,  that's  splendid — splendid— to  have  emancipated  all 
the  slaves! 

Lincoln. 

I  have  only  done  what  no  man  could  have  helped  doing, 
standing  in  my  place !  A,  D.,  if  you  remember  me  here- 
after, let  it  be,  not  as  one  who  loved  black  man  or  white  man 
predominantly,  but  as  one  who  loved  his  country ! 

A.  D. 

I  will !  Indeed  I  will  I  But,  oh,  Mr.  Lincoln— you're 
not  going  away  ? 

Lincoln. 

[Who  has  turned  to  go,  turns  had'.]  It  is  1865,  my  boy, 
the  war  is  over  and  my  work  is  done ! 


A.  D. 

Mr.  Lincoln,  before  you  go,  tell  me  how  it  is  we  dream 
each  other. 

Lincoln. 

I  reckon  it  is  this  way,  A.  D. :  You  are  part  of  my  coun- 
try's future  and  I  am  part  of  your  country's  past,  and  each 
needs  to  take  the  other  into  consideration  in  order  to  do 
what  is  right  in  the  present. 


130  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

A.  D. 

I  begin  to  understand. 

LiXCOLX. 

And  now,  with  malice  toward  none,  with  charity  for  all. 
let  ns  set  ourselves  to  bind  up  the  nation's  wounds  and 
do  all  we  may  to  achieve  a  just  and  lasting  peace  among 
ourselves  and  all  nations — a  just  and  lasting  peace!  God 
bless  and  prosper  you,  A.  D.  I     [Goes  hy  second  door.} 

A.  D. 

[Stands,  looling  after  Lixcolx,  as  if  in  a  dream,  then 
rouses  himself,  rubhing  his  eyes.'\  Abraham  Lincoln,  Six- 
teenth President  of  the  United  States — I  feel  as  if  I  had 
seen  him  and  known  him,  and  received  his  blessing  I  I  can 
write  the  finest  composition  that  ever  was  about  him! 
[Seizes  pencil  and  paper,  and  writes,  while  going  out  hy 
second  door.} — With  malice  toward  none,  with  charity  for 
all,  to  bind  up  the  nation's  wounds  and  do  all  we  may  to 
achieve  a  just  and  lasting  peace  among  ourselves  and  all 
nations — a  just  and  lasting  peace ! 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB 


Meviorial  Day 


To  Caeolyn  p.  D. 

AND  ALL  YOUNG  PATRIOTS 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB 

A  Memorial  Day  Play. 

ChAPcACTERS 

A  group  of  boys  and  girls  who  assume  the  names  of  flowers, 

trees,  etc. 
An  old  Union  soldier  with  right  arm  missing. 
An  old  Confederate  soldier  with  left  arm  missing. 

Time 
Memorial  Day,  morning. 

SCEN-E 

A  room  with  two  doors,  one  leading  to  an  inner  room,  the 
other  to  the  street.  A  window  overloolcs  the  street. 
Flags  are  much  in  evidence,  also  lanners  tcith  the 
motto  of  the  cluh.  Baskets  of  flowers  stand  about. 
Green  loughs  are  stacked  in  corners.  The  girls,  as- 
sisted by  some  of  the  smaller  hoys,  are  engaged  in 
weaving  wreaths  and  other  Memorial  Day  devices. 
The  hoys,  who  constitute  the  hand,  are  in  the  inner 
room,  practising  patriotic  selections.  Each,  hoy  and 
girl,  wears  a  flower  or  sprig,  artificial  or  natural,  to 
show  his  or  her  cluh  name.     Each  girl  has  her  own 


134  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

pair  of  scissors,  tagged  with  her  name-flower,  or  a 
special  color,  for  identification.  Ehoda,  the  president, 
sits  beside  a  table  and  keeps  order  with  a  gavel.  FoR- 
GET-ME-xoT,  the  secretary,  records  forfeits  in  a  hook. 
The  girls  are  singing  to  the  hoys'  playing,  as  they  work. 


Johnny  Jumper. 

[The  drummer,  comes  from  the  inner  room.']    Yoii  girls  ! 
Aren't  you  ready  yet?     Slow  coaches! 
[The  girls  exclaim,  protesting.'] 


Ehoda. 

[Raps.]  Order  !  Order  !  Don't  fidget  so,  Johnny  Jumper ! 
It  isn't  nearly  time  to  start  I  Come,  girls ;  make  haste ! 
It's  nearly  time  to  start!     [All  laugh.] 


Violet. 

How  I  do  love  Memorial  Day !  I  wish  it  came  once  a 
week!  It  is  so  affecting  to  think  of  the  heroes  who  have 
fought,  bled  and  died  for  their  country ! 


Xasturtium. 

In  Fweedom's  sacwed  name  amen ! 
[A  general  murmur  of  admiration.] 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB  135 

Althea. 

I  wish  somebod}^  would  recite  something  !  Where's  Pen- 
nyroyal? 0  Eoy,  darling,  won't  you  say  a  nice  patriotic 
piece  for  sister?  Something  about  people  groaning  and 
bleeding  on  the  battlefield? 

[A  general  munniir  of  approhaiion,  while  Penny- 
royal comes  forward.] 


Penny. 

A  tholdier  of  the  Legion  lay  dying  in  Algierth. 

There  wath  lack  of  woman'th  nurthing,  there  wath  dearth 

of  woman'th  tearth. 
But  a  comrade  thtood  bethide  him  while  the  life-blood — 

the   life-blood — the   life-blood — I    don't   remember 

what  the  life-blood  did ! 
[Bursts  into  tears.] 

Althea. 

[Comforts  liim.]     You  precious  lamb! 

FOEGET-ME-NOT. 

Miss  President,  does  he  have  to  pay  a  forfeit  for  not 
remembering  about  the  life-blood? 

[Loud  cries  of  ''No,  no!     The  p-ecious  lamh!     Of 
course  uot!"] 

Myrtle. 
There  !     How  does  this  look  ?     [Holding  up  wreath.] 


136  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Rhoda. 
Very  nice,  Myrtle.    But  I  think  it  needs  more  green ! 

Myrtle. 

So  it  does !     Douglas  Pine,  get  me  some  of  that  green 
stuff;  there's  a  dear! 

Douglas. 

[While  oicying.]     Don't  you  call  me  dear!     I  ain't  no 
dear! 

[General  cries  of  '"Order!  Order!  Forfeit!  For- 
feit! Bad  grammar!  Ain't — Ain't  no  dear!''  For- 
GET-ME-xoT  records  the  forfeits.] 

Myrtle. 

I  take  it  back !    Un-dear !    Some  day  you'll  be  sorry,  you 
horrid  boy ! 

Bell. 

Scissors,    scissors,   where   are  my   scissors?     Marigold, 
please  lend  me  your  scissors ! 


Marigold. 

I  would,  Bell,  gladly,  but  it's  against  the  rules  to  bor- 
row and  lend ! 

Bell. 

Well,  then,  just  hand  them  to  me ! 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    137 

Marigold. 
Same  thing.    Besides,  I  need  them  myself ! 

Daisy. 

Here,  Bell,  take  mine.    If  I  press  them  on  you  it  won't 
be  borrowing  and  lending ! 

Bell. 
Daisy,  you're  a  daisy  I 

Lilac. 

How  do  you  like  my  anchor?  [A  general  exclamation  of 
^'Very  pretty,  Lilac  !'']  I  chose  an  anchor  because  it's  a 
sign  of  hope,  and  I  think  dead  soldiers  ought  to  be  made 
to  feel  hopeful  and  encouraged!  [General  laughter.']  I 
mean,  I  think  living  soldiers  ought  to  be  made  to  feel  hope- 
ful and  encouraged  by  seeing  what  we  do  for  dead  ones ! 
[More  laughter.']  Well,  anyway,  the  florist  let  me  have  the 
frame  at  a  bargain !     [More  laughter.] 

Bell. 
Scissors,  scissors !    Turn  your  head  away,  Marigold ;  I'm 
going  to  help  myself  to  your  scissors ! 

Lily. 

Bell's  motto  ought  to  be  Providence  helps  those  who  help 
themselves!     [General  laughter!] 


138  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Bell. 

Don't  be  sarcastic,  Lily,  for  I'm  going  to  steal  your 
string. 

Johnny. 

You  girls,  do  hurry !    All  the  patriotic  fizz  is  going  out 
of  the  band ! 

Ehoda. 

We  are  quite  ready,  Johnny  Jumper !     At  least,  nearly 
quite  !     Girls,  aren't  you  nearly  ready  ? 

Seteeal. 
Mine  is  finished !    I'm  ready !    etc. 

Bell. 

How  can  I  be  ready  without  scissors  ?    Poppy,  be  a  duck, 
and  cut  this  string  for  me ! 

Poppy. 

But,  Bell,  you  have  my  scissors ! 

Bell. 

Havel?    Oh,  I  don't  think  so !    Myrtle,  Althea,  Holly- 
hock, Nasturtium,  Violet,  somebody — scissors ! 

Several. 

Y^ou  already  have  mine !    And  mine !  etc. 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    139 

Daisy. 
Why,  Bell,  there  they  all  are,  in  your  lap ! 

Bell. 
Why  so  they  are!     However  did  they  come  there? 

Daisy. 

And  here  are  your  own,  dangling  from  your  waist ! 

Bell. 

However  did  they  get  there  !  Xow  give  me  one  minute ! 
Pennyroyal,  darling,  won't  you  say  a  nice  piece  about  mar- 
tial military  soldiers  while  Bell  finishes  her  wreath? 

Pexxy. 

Half  a  league,  half  a  league,  half  a  league  onward.  All 
in  the  valley  of  death  rode  the  thikth  hundred.     Cannon 

to   right  of  them,   cannon  to [Stops  short,  pulls  up 

sleeve  and  examines  arm  carefully.] 

Rhoda. 
What's  the  matter,  Roy  ? 

Pexxy. 

I  have  to  find  my  vacthination  mark! 


140  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Ehoda. 
His  vaccination  mark  I    What  does  the  child  mean ! 

Althea. 

That's  the  way  he  remembers  which  arm  to  shoot  out 
when  he  says  cannon  to  right  of  them  I  The  lamb  !  [Hugs 
Pexxyroyal.] 

Bell. 
Xow  I'm  ready ! 

Ehoda. 

Good !  Xow  each  must  write  on  a  card  to  say  who  her 
wreath  is  for.  [Several  cries  of  ''Forfeit,  forfeit!"]  Why 
must  I  pay  a  forfeit  ?  I  said  each  and  her,  not  their !  [Cries 
of  'IVho  for.]  Oh,  to  be  sure!  Whom  for,  for  whom! 
Whom  for,  for  whom !  What  a  silly  fuss  the  grammar  does 
make  about  one  little  letter !  Each  write  on  a  card  whom 
her  wreath  is  for !  Unless  anybody  else  speaks  for  him  I 
choose  George  Washington!  He  is  my  favorite  patriotic 
hero,  though  he  did  not  die  on  the  battlefield.  He  exposed 
his  person  repeatedly  to  the  bullets  of  the  enemy.  The 
history  says  so.  He  might  have  been  killed  in  every  battle 
in  which  he  took  part.  And,  then,  too,  we  get  a  holiday 
on  his  birthday!  [Writes  on  card  and  ties  this  to  her 
wreath.] 

Marigold. 

I'll  take  Lafayette.  He  gave  up  everything  to  fight 
for  ua 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    141 

Nasturtium. 
In  fweedom's  sacwed  name,  amen! 

Lily. 

General  Thomas  is  my  hero.     Chicamauga,  April  19, 
1863. 

Althea. 

The  only  date  Lily  knows.    And  now  I  suppose  you  are 
going  to  tell  us  j^ou're  related  to  him! 


Lily. 

And  so  I  am,  in  a  sort  of  way,  by  marriage.  My  grand- 
mother's step-sister  was  bridesmaid  to  his  aunt!  [Laugli- 
ter.']  ^'To  the  hero  of  Chicamauga,  from  his  loving  cousin, 
Lily!" 

Lilac. 

I  shall  take  a  naval  hero,  since  I  have  the  anchor.  Be- 
sides, I  dote  on  the  uniform.    David  Farragut. 


Violet. 

I  wish  I  could  think  of  someone  who  made  a  beautiful 
end.     I  do  so  love  last  words. 

Douglas. 
All  women  do ! 


142  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Violet. 

You  horrid  boy!  I  won't  give  you  the  satisfaction  of 
answering  you!  [General  laiigMer.~\  I  know  who  made  a 
lovely  end.  Lawrence  of  the  Chesapeake.  "Don't  give  up 
the  ship,  boys !" 

Myrtle. 

I  choose  General  Grant,  because  he  brought  the  Civil 
War  to  a  close.  And  then  he  has  such  a  stylish  tomb ! 
[General  laughter.]  He  has.  I  tell  you!  My  Xew  York 
cousins  sent  it  to  me  on  a  picture  postal  card!  [More 
laughter.] 

Daisy. 
I  think  I  shall  dedicate  mine  to  a  horse! 


Several. 
A  horse,  Daisy!    What  horse? 

Daisy. 

I  don't  know  its  name,  but  it's  the  horse  that  won  the 
battle  in  the  piece  that  Roy  recites ! 

Penny. 

I  know  what  you  mean,  Daithy.    Only  it'th  not  a  horthe. 
It'th  a  thteed ! 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    143 

Eere  ith  the  thteed  that  thaved  the  day. 
By  carrying  Sheridan  into  the  fight 
From  Winchethter,  twenty  mileth  away! 

[AU  applaud,  except  Douglas,  who  laughs,  mimicking 
Pexxyrotal.] 

Douglas. 

Thithy! 

Penny. 

Don't  you  call  me  a  thithy ! 

Douglas. 

Thithy  !    Lithping  thithy  I 

[Pexxyrotal  attacks  him.    They  fight.    Other  hoys 
run  in,  delighted.    The  girls  all  talk  at  once.] 

Rhoda. 

[Raps.']      Order !      Order !      Forget-me-not,   please  put 
down  ten  forfeits  each  for  Pennyroyal  and  Douglas  Pine  I 

Douglas. 
I  don't  care !    He  does  lithp  ! 

Pex'X'y. 
I  don't  care  I    I'm  not  a  thithy ! 


144  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Althea. 
You  sweet  thing  I     [Hugs  Pexxyroyal.] 

Ehoda. 
Is  everybody  ready? 

Several. 
I  am.    I  am.    All  but  Bell ! 

Bell. 

I  can't  think  of  any  name !  Someone  lend  me  an  idea ! 
[General  laughter.]  Well,  I  don't  care.  It's  too  stupid 
to  hang  wreaths  on  a  perfectly  empty  soldiers'  and  sailors' 
monument!  Every  other  village  has  a  local  hero  in  the 
cemetery!     [General  murmur  of  assejit.] 

Violet. 

Y"es,  and  we  can't  even  boast  of  a  veteran! 

Poppy. 
My  father's  a  veteran ! 

PiXK. 

Poppy,  he  is  no  such  thing ! 

Poppy. 
I  tell  you,  Pink,  he  is !    He  is,  he  is,  he  is ! 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    145 

PiXK. 

He  is  not  I    Your  father  is  a  horse  doctor ! 

Poppy. 

It's  the  same  thing,  only  they  call  him  Yet.  for  short! 
[General  laughter.] 

Althea. 
Y^ou  precious  pet!     [Embraces  Poppy.] 

Marigold. 

[Wlio  is  lool'ing  out  of  window,  excited.]  Oh,  girls  and 
boys,  there  goes  one  now !  A  real  live  veteran — in  uniform, 
with  only  one  arm!     [Great  excitement.] 

Rhoda. 
Oh,    Sunflower,    Bachelor's     Buttons,    Sweet     William, 
Douglas  Pine,  go  quick,  invite  him  in !     We'll  ask  him  to 
march  in  the  procession ! 

[Several  hoys  and  girls  have  run  into  the  street.    They 
now  return,  bringing  in  the  Uxiox  Soldier.] 

Uxiox  Soldier. 
Well,  boys  and  gals,  what's  all  this  to-do? 

PiHODA. 

Club,  rise!  [All  who  are  seated  rise.]  Mr.  Veteran- 
Patriot,  we  salute  you! 


mm 


146  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

All. 

We  salute  you! 

Nasturtium. 

In  Fweedom's  sac"«'ed  name,  amen! 
[All  sit] 

Union  Soldier. 

Don't  mention  it !  What  air  tliis,  a  sewing  bee,  or  a  class 
in  botany  ? 

All. 

Botany !  This  is  the  Dulce  et  Decorum  Club ! 

Rhoda. 

We  go  by  the  names  of  flowers  and  trees.  I,  for  example, 
am  Rhoda,  which  is  Greek  for  rose.  I  tell  you  that,  sir, 
not  because  I  think  you  do  not  know  it,  but  because  I  think 
you  ought  to  know  that  I  do  know  it ! 

Lily. 
And  I'm  Lily — tiger,  Easter,  or  simply  of-the-valley. 

Bell. 

And  I  am  Bell — hare,  blue,  or  Canterbury.  Any  kind 
of  bell. 

Grass. 
[A  hoy.]    I'm  no  blooming  flower  ! 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    147 

FORGET-ME-XOT. 

Blooming  flower  sounds  so  common.     Shall  I  put  him 
down  for  a  forfeit? 

Grass. 
Well,  I  am  common.    I'm  a  weed !    I'm  grass ! 

Althea. 
Goodness  knows  you  are  green  enough ! 

Uxiox  Soldier. 

That's  all  right,  son.     Grass  is  a  mighty  good  thing,  in 
its  place — if  you  manage  to  keep  it  down!     [Laughter.] 

Myrtle. 

The  girls  are  active  members.    The  boys  are  too  lazy  to 
be  active,  so  they  are  only  honorary ! 

JOHXXY. 

Lazy !    I  like  that  I    What  about  the  band ! 

Myrtle. 

You  know  3'ou  are  only  a  band  because  you  like  to  make 
a  noise!     [The  hoys  protest.] 


148  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


Ehoda. 


We  meet  once  a  year  regularly.  This  is  our  first  meeting. 
Our  object  is  to  weave  Memorial  Day  Garlands  for  dead 
heroes 

Violet. 

Who  have  fought,  bled,  and  died  for  country. 

jSTasturtium. 
In  Fweedom's  sacwed  name,  amen! 

Daisy. 

And  then  we  label  them  with  the  names  of  famous  gen- 
erals, with  dates  of  birth,  death,  and  battles.  You  see  that 
makes  us  feel  patriotic,  and  helps  us  remember  our  history ! 

Rhoda. 

Our  motto  is — Club,  recite  our  motto  for  the  veteran ! 

All. 
Dulce  et  decorum  est  pro  patria  mori ! 

Rhoda. 

And  now  translate  it !  I  ask  them  to  translate  it,  sir, 
not  because  I  think  you  do  not  understand  it,  but  because 
I  think  you  ought  to  know  that  we  do  understand  it ! 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    149 

All. 
It  is  sweet  and  fitting  to  die  for  one's  country ! 

Union  Soldier. 

Oh,  I  understand  it  well  enough!  It's  what  them  as 
stays  at  home  always  says  about  them  they've  sent  out  to 
get  killed. 

[A  general  murmur  of  surprise,  as  if  this  were  a  new 
idea.] 

Marigold. 

But  wouldn't  the  killed  ones  say  it,  if  they  had  stayed  at 
home  and  the  stay-at-homes  were  killed? 

Union  Soldier. 

]\rebbe !  Thar's  no  telling !  The  killed  ones  aren't  free 
to  express  themselves.  It's  the  stay-at-homes  as  has  the  last 
word ! 

Bell. 

[Rises.']  I  want  to  make  a  motion.  Whereas — whereas — 
Oh^  won't  someone  give  me  the  word  I  want !  [Sits  dovm 
amid  laughter.] 

Marigold. 

Whereas  our  village  now  has  a  veteran,  I  resolve  that  we 
move  to  make  him  a  member  of  our  club  I  [Murmurs  of 
assent.]  I  don't  quite  see  what  sort  of  a  member.  He 
can't  be  active,  because — because — well,  just  because.  And 
he  can't  be  honorary  and  play  on  a  two-handed  instrument 
for  the  same  reason.     But  some  kind  of  a  member ! 


150  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Ehoda. 

Wh}-  not  a  life-member !     That  is,  during  his  lifetime ! 

Violet. 

[Claps  her  hands.]  Oh,  lovely !  And  then  when  you  die 
we  can  give  you  a  military  funeral,  and  lay  wreaths  upon 
your  tomb ! 

All. 

Aye,  aye ! 

Ehoda. 

Carried  unanimously,  without  even  having  been  sec- 
onded! 

LTnion  Soldier. 

I^m  sure  I'm  greatly  honored,  and  I  will  say  that  you're 
as  fine  a  lot  of  boys  and  gals  as  ever  I  seen!     [Applause.'] 

FORGET-ME-XOT. 

Do  life-members  pay  grammar  forfeits  ?  Because,  if  so, 
I  need  a  new  book!     [Cries  of  Oh,  no,  Forget-me-xot  !] 

Grass. 
Please  sir,  won't  you  tell  us  about  your  right  arm  ? 

Douglas. 

You  dolt,  how  can  he  tell  about  his  right  arm  when  he 
hasn't  got  one ! 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    151 

Grass. 
That's  what  I  mean,  only  I  didn't  like  to  say  so ! 

Uxiox  Soldier. 

That's  all  right,  son!  I  ain't  sensitive  about  what  I 
haven't  got !    I  lost  it  at  Gettysburg ! 

All. 

[ThriUed.]    At  Gettysburg ! 

Union  Soldier. 

Just  by  an  accident ! 

All. 

[Disappointed.]     Oh,  by  accident! 

Union  Soldier. 

Aye.  The  fool  that  shot  me  never  could  have  hit  me  if 
he'd  aimed  at  me  !  I  ought  to  know,  seeing  he  was  my  own 
brother ! 

All. 

[Horrified.]    Your  own  brother  ! 

Violet. 
Ohj  doesn't  he  feel  sorry,  and  ashamed ! 


152  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Ui^^iON  Soldier. 

Can't  say,  miss!  He  had  no  chance  to  express  himself, 
for,  you  see,  I  shot  him  dead — clear  through  the  heart ! 

All. 

[Outraged.]     You  shot  your  own  brother! 

Union  Soldier. 

That's  war,  children !  You  don't  stop  to  ask  who's  who 
on  the  battlefield  I  But  it  was  just  Jim's  ill-luck,  getting  in 
the  way  of  my  gun  and  me  a  dead  shot !    Plain  ill-luck  ! 

Violet. 

But,  Oh,  how  proud,  how  gloriously  proud,  you  must 
feel,  of  that  empty  sleeve ! 

Union  Soldier. 

Proud !  Me  proud !  Would  you  feel  proud,  if  you  never 
could  shave  yourself  for  the  remainder  of  your  days  ? 

Violet. 
I  never  thought  of  that! 

Daisy. 

I  move  that  we  dedicate  all  the  wreaths  that  are  left  over 
to  our  veteran's  brother  Jim,  who  perished  so  gloriously  by 
the  bullet  of  his  brother — I  mean,  the  enemy,  at  Gettys- 
burg I 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    153 

Several. 
I  second  the  motion  I    Aye,  aye,  aye ! 

Ehoda. 

Carried,  without  even  being  put  to  the  vote  I 

Uxiox  Soldier. 

I'm  sure  I'm  very  much  obliged — I  mean,  Jim  would  be 
— or  anyway  mother  would  be,  if  she  were  living  I  It  is  a 
great  compliment  to  the  family  I  Here,  what  are  you 
a-doing  with  that  gun  I  Give  it  to  me  at  once  I  [Snatches 
gun  from  Douglas,  who  is  just  pointing  it  at  another  hoy.] 

■     Douglas. 
"VTliy,  it  isn't  loaded  I    I  looked  down  it  to  see  ! 

Uxiox  Soldier. 

Empty  guns  is  always  loaded  when  you  fool  with  them  I 
Thar's  a  little  rhyme  I  once  learned  about  that  I 
Never  with  a  fooVs  idea  of  fun. 
Point  at  a  comrade  with  an  empty  gun, 
Because  the  devil  has  a  way — [The  young  ladies  must  ex- 
cuse the  devil,  but  I  have  to  bring  him  in  I]     Because 
the  devil  has  a  way. 
Of  loading  empty  guns,  they  say. 

And  in  a  flash  two  lives  may  he  undone!     [General  ap- 
plause.] 


154  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Xow^  so  as  YOU  mayn't  never  forget  it,  I'm  going  to  take 
you  boys  into  that  thar  room,  and  larn  it  to  you  by  heart ! 
[He  takes  the  boys  into  the  inner  room.    The  girls  Iaiigh.~\ 


Myetle. 

Isn't  it  lovely  to  have  a  veteran  all  of  our  very  own ! 

Violet. 
And  a  dead  hero,  too !    Would  you  call  Jim  a  hero  since 
he  was  only  killed  by  accident? 

Violet. 

Oh,  yes ;  give  liim  the  benefit  of  the  doubt,  because  if  we 
only  knew  we  might  find  that  he  made  a  beautiful  end, 
uttering  last  words  that  were  full  of  poetry  and  patriotism. 
[There  is  a  knock  at  the  street  door.] 

Rhoda. 

Who's  that  I  wonder  I  Sunflower,  please  be  a  committee 
to  open  the  door!  [Suxflower  opens  the  door,  and  ad- 
mits the  Confederate  soldier.    All  gasp  with  surprise.] 

All. 
Another  veteran  I     [All  rise.] 

Althea. 
And  a  gray  one !    What  luck  ! 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB  155 

Confederate  Soldier. 

[Salutes.']  I  beg  pardon,  young  ladies,  but  could  you 
direct  me  to  the  cemetery  ? 

All. 
The  cemetery? 

PiXK. 

Oh,  sir !    Are  you  a  ghost  ? 

Confederate  Soldier. 

A  ghost !  Me  !  If  I  was  a  ghost  with  the  use  of  my  legs 
the  cemetery  is  the  last  place  they'd  carry  me  to !  But  as 
it's  Memorial  Day  I  reckon  thar'll  be  some  sort  of  a  festive 
lay-out  at  the  cemetery  ! 

Rhoda. 

Sir,  I  blush  to  confess  it,  but  our  cemetery  boasts  no 
hero's  grave !  The  best  we  can  offer  is  a  perfectly  empty 
Soldiers'  and  Sailors'  monument  on  the  green.  You  see, 
no  one  from  this  village  ever  went  to  war ! 

Lily. 

Of  course  if  a  new  war  broke  out  now  we  should  cheer- 
fully sacrifice  our  brothers!  [The  girls  murmur  assent. 
Some  hoys  who  have  strayed  hack  protest  vigorously.] 

Grass. 
No  you  don't  sacrifice  me ! 


156  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Pennyroyal,  Poppy  axd  Pink. 
Coward!  Cowardy-custard !    'Fraid  cat! 

Grass. 

That's  all  right  for  you  little  tots !  But  if  anything  in 
the  nature  of  a  boy  of  my  own  size  or  larger  calls  me  coward 
he'll  find  down-trodden  grass  on  top  of  him,  that's  all !  But 
no  soldiering  with  empty  sleeves  for  me,  thank  you.  I  mean 
to  be  a  fireman,  or  a  waiter.     [Returns  to  inner  room.'] 

Lily. 

At  least,  if  we  can't  sacrifice  our  brothers  we  will  sacri- 
fice our  sires  and  our  sons !     [General  approval] 

Confederate  Soldier. 

Oh,  I  wouldn't  be  too  keen  about  doing  that,  sister.  War 
is  a  dirty  business  and  miserably  paid!  And  the  glory 
ain't  equally  distributed!     [Murmur  of  surprise.] 

Lilac. 

But,  though  you  weren't  fortunate  enough  to  give  your 
life,  at  least  you  gave  your  arm  to  your  country !  How  you 
must  glory  in  that  empty  sleeve !     [Murmur  of  assent.] 

Confederate  Soldier. 

Me  glory  in  it !  How  would  you  like  to  go  through  life 
eating  off  your  knife  and  not  brought  up  to  it  in  that  hand  ? 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB  157 

Lilac. 

But,  sir — sir — your  knife — why,  it's  your  left  hand  you 
lost! 

Confederate  Soldier. 

Just  my  luck  I  I  was  born  a  left-handed  man !  [Mur- 
mur of  sympathy.    Violet  suddenly  bursts  into  tears.^ 

All. 
Why,  Violet,  what  is  the  matter  I 

Violet. 
Oh,  dear !    These  veterans  are  taking  away  our  heroes  ! 

Coxfederate  Soldier. 
What^s  that,  missy  ?    I  ain"t  taken  nothin'  from  you ! 

Ehoda. 

She  means  you  don't  seem  to  think  it  sweet  and  fitting  to 
die  for  one's  country !     [All  corroborate.] 

Coxfederate  Soldier. 

It's  more  than  sweet  and  fitting.  It's  grand,  sublime, 
when  it's  forced  on  you !  But  all  the  same  there'd  be  less 
fighting  among  us  men  if  your  sex  weren't  so  keen  about 
cheering  us  on  with  garlands  and  glory-talk ! 

[A  general  murmur  of  surprise.     Poppy  bursts  into 
sudden  tears.1 


J.JJ.^.    ilJL ,::^-^^^- 


158  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

All. 
Why,  Poppy,  what  is  the  matter  ? 

Poppy. 

I  never  could  remember  what  caused  the  War  of  1812, 
and  now —  Oh,  it  is  awful  to  tliink  it  was  my  sex  that 
caused  it ! 

Althea. 

Y^ou  duck  !    [Embraces  Poppy.] 

Ehoda. 

Girls,  if  no  one  has  any  objection,  suppose  we  unani- 
mously elect  this  veteran  also  a  life-member  of  our  club  ! 

All. 
Aye,  aye,  aye ! 

Confederate  Soldier. 

I  thank  you  kindly !  And  will  strive  to  deserve  the  honor ! 
[All  sit.~\ 

Marigold. 

Now  we  have  two  veterans :  one  of  each  color ! 

COXFEDEEATE  SOLDIER. 

Eh  !  What's  that  ?    What  color  ?    [Starting  up.] 

All. 
Why,  you're  gray ! 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    159 

COXFEDEEATE   SOLDIER. 

Aye,  I'm  gray — but  what  color  is  the  other  one ! 

All. 

Blue ! 

Confederate  Soldier. 
Oh,  blue's  all  right  I    Xext  to  gray  I     [Sits  again.l 

Forget-:me-not. 

I'd  like  to  enter  your  other  arm  in  our  minute  book,  sir, 
if  you  don't  mind  telling  us  where  you  left  it ! 

Confederate  Soldier. 

Gettysburg!  [All  exclaim.']  Just  my  bad  luck!  We 
fired  at  the  same  time,  and  he  being  always  a  poor  marks- 
man, only  winged  me,  while  I  shot  him  through  the  heart ! 

Daisy. 

But  why  was  that  bad  luck  ?    You  killed  an  enemy ! 

Confederate  Soldier. 

Aye,  but  though  Bill  warn't  much  to  brag  of,  he  just 
chanced  to  be  my  own  brother !  [All  exclaim.']  Mother 
would  have  been  so  mortified ! 


All. 


But,  why? 


160  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

Confederate  Soldier. 
Well  3'ou  see,  mother  had  two  kinds  of  pride,  the  sporty 
kind,  and  the  mother  kind.     She'd  have  been  so  mortified 
to  have  Bill  miss  me,  when  he  aimed  at  me,  and  so  sorry 
to  have  me  kill  Bill,  seeing  he  was  my  brother ! 

All. 

Bill !  Bill ! 

Rhoda. 

Mr.  Veteran  Jim — didn't  you  say  your  name  is  Jim  ? 

Coxfedekate  Soldier. 
I  didn't,  but  it  is ! 

Rhoda. 

Suppose  after  all  you  didn't  kill  your  brother  Bill ! 

All. 
Y"es ;  suppose ! 

Coxfederate  Soldier. 

Y^oung  lady,  do  you  accuse  me  of  being  a  someputy  some- 
thing liar !     [Starting  iip.~\ 

Rhoda. 

Oh^  no!    But — suppose!     [All  repeat.    Yes,  suppose!] 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB  161 

Confederate  Soldier. 

Arter  me  killing  him !  I'd  like  to  see  Bill  take  such  a 
liberty!  [All  alarmed,  exchange  whispers.  Just  then  the 
door  opens  to  admit  the  Union  Soldier  and  the  60^5.] 

Khoda. 

Oh,  dear  !  They  must  not  meet !  Quick,  everybody  !  Be  a 
committee  to  hold  Mr.  Jim  behind  the  door !  [In  a  panic 
the  girls  seize  the  Confederate  Soldier  and  thrust  him 
behind  the  door,  holding  him  there,  while  he  protests, 
amazed,  and  tries  to  get  out.] 

Union  Soldier. 
What's  all  this  noise  ! 

Ehoda. 
Mr.  Veteran  Bill —    Don't  deny  that  your  name  is  Bill ! 

Union  Soldier. 
I  won't  deny  it,  since  it  is,  and  you  seem  to  know  it,  Miss ! 

Ehoda. 
Suppose  Jim  were  alive ! 

Girls. 
Yes,  suppose ! 

UxiON  Soldier. 

When  I  shot  him  dead  at  Gettysburg?    Never!    ^^ev-er! 


162  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 

COXFEDERATE   SOLDIER. 

Bill! 

Uxiox  Soldier. 
Jim !    Wh}' — what — where — Jim  ! 

All. 

Hold  them  !  Keep  them  apart !  They'll  kill  each  other ! 
[A  struggle  ensues,  the  two  old  men  seeking  to  get  at  each 
other,  while  the  children,  mistaking  their  intention,  strive 
to  keep  them  apart.  At  last  with  a  supreme  effort,  Jim  and 
Bill  shake  themselves  free  and  fall  into  one  another's  em- 
hrace,  with  exclamations  of  rejoicing,  luhile  the  children 
fall  back,  overcome  with  amazement.'] 

Uxiox  Soldier. 

Oh,  Jim  !  Arter  all  these  years  !  I  haven't  had  a  happy 
moment  since  I  done  it,  Jim ! 

Confederate  Soldier. 
Nor  me,  Bill !    Wouldn't  mother  be  glad ! 

All. 

[In  an  amazed  ivhisper.']  They  are  not  going  to  kill  each 
other  after  all ! 

Violet. 

Oh,  isn't  it  affecting  !  \Wipes  eyes.l  Like  a  story !  [All 
assent.] 


THE  DULCE  ET  DECORUM  CLUB    163 

UxioN  Soldier. 

Children,  this  is  war !  Two  broken-down  old  men,  each 
maimed  by  the  other's  hand !  Each  having  missed  by  acci- 
dent the  other's  heart!  Do  you  know  what  the  great 
General  Sherman  said  of  war  ? 


Confederate  Soldier. 
Bill,  I'm  ashamed  of  you,  before  young  ladies ! 

Union  Soldier. 

That's  all  right,  Jim !  Well,  children,  General  Sherman 
compared  war  to  a  place  that  is  supposed  to  have  a  pe- 
culiarly hot  and  uncomfortable  climate  !    And  he  was  right ! 

Confederate  Soldier. 

Dead  Eight !  Do  you  know  what  Washington  said  of 
war?  He  said  that  at  best  war  is  a  sword  sheathed  in  a 
brother's  breast! 

Douglas. 

But  not  every  enemy  is  your  brother ! 

Confederate  Soldier. 
Oh,  yes,  he  is — your  brother  more  or  less  removed ! 


164  HOLIDAY  PLAYS 


Uniox  Soldier. 


Then,  fight,  as  the  real  heroes  have  fought,  for  the  right, 
for  your  country,  for  liberty — but  never  go  to  war,  never 
send  others  to  war,  without  praying  with  all  your  soul  for 
peace ! 

COXFEDERATE   SOLDIER. 

Aye,  that's  it ;  for  the  world's  peace ! 

All. 

For  the  world's  peace  ! 

^N'asturtium. 

[Voice  trembling  with  emotion.]  In  Fweedom's  sacwed 
name 

All. 

Amen! 

[The  procession  forms.  With  fags,  banners,  wreaths, 
and  music,  they  all  fall  into  line,  the  tivo  old  sol- 
diers wdlTcing  together,  and  march  off  to  the  Sol- 
diers' and  Sailors*  Monument.] 


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ol'^luT^.'V^  '°  "'^^^  °^  th'e  /ourt;: 

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NOV  22  1932 
N'^V  17  1934 

DEC  II  1935 
^Cr  14  1936 


^ee  . 


^i 


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FEi  29  1946 


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NOV  I 


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